Board Thread:Season 46 - Kariba/@comment-33060993-20180413125904

''Ahhhh! Hello, faves, hosts, and anyone else who has decided it is worth their time to read this mess of a speech. I just want to start by thanking the hosts for putting all this time and WORK into the season. It was a wonderful experience with my Kariba family. ''

Throughout this speech, I want to go through the highlights and lowlights of my gameplay and explain why I think I’m deserving of those cute jury votes y’all have.

I hope you all find I deserve to be the forty-sixth Sole Survivor for the social, strategic, and physical acumen I consistently displayed across the season to advance to where I am today. Like any player, I had flaws and made mistakes - but I think they are outweighed by the merits I want to go into, as well as my ability to learn from them. I’ll kind of organize my game into its individual stages!

Summary

I think the best way to describe my game was adaptive. I think my understanding of the pace, the relationship network, the advantages in play, and what I needed to be and when I needed to be it was masterful enough that I was able to maneuver through every phase of the game accomplishing a set of goals to reach Final Tribal Council with a social and strategic game dominant enough that jurors would appoint me a win. My key setback was the swapped situation, which threw me into the merge not knowing several people I’d need to work with; it occasionally led to a blindside, but I overcame it well enough to make it here with (more or less) the people I wanted to sit next to.

Original Zambezi (F18 - F15)

On my original tribe, I had a few goals to lay the foundation for solid social and strategic framework across the season; I believe that by accomplishing these goals, I set myself up for the next stages of the game: Swapped Zambezi (F15 - F12)
 * become a driving force in challenges: I wanted to win to the extent that I was a key contributing force, without necessarily dominating to the extent where I could reveal my challenge capabilities. By taking a key role in the challenges that Zambezi would win I managed to accomplish an association with tribal success that I think fostered conversations in my favor—winning is a source of positivity, one that I needed.
 * develop strategic framework with my tribe-mates: I did not want to strategically dominate or control Zambezi, but rather establish a network that I could use to maneuver in the more complicated stages of the games. This worked successfully for me, as I developed some sort of alliance with Dovile, Louise, Elizabeth, Augusto, Jordan (Becky) and Dan (Gossip Girl/(flopped) Skinny Legends, respectively). Despite sharing Augusto’s allied connections, I maneuvered them in a way to lay foundations rather than expose my own cards and end my game tragically early. I think I connected pretty well with everyone socially and with quite a few people strategically—enough so that even though Augusto and I were p close, three people informed me of the situation, allowing me to abandon that sinking ship. While Augusto was not my ideal outcome, but one that I believe I worked to reiterate my bonds with virtually every OG Zambezi moving forward, which I’ll go into on…

''Walking into the swapped tribes, I felt like I was at an advantage and a disadvantage. Numerically speaking, the five Zambezi members outnumbered the two Hwadze members and within that core of five, I could pick between Ben/Elizabeth and Dovile/Louise to determine our course. But swapfuckery wasn’t cute AT ALL and my objectives were to prevent others and myself from falling victim to it as I laid foundations for the merge:'' As for the votes, F14 (Kiley) was obvious for the same reasons as Nic; F13 (Ben) was one wherein I took a side and tried to foster a perception that I would be loyal, while also keeping Elizabeth in on the off chance that our tribe stopped being the titanic and we could potentially work different sides in the merge. I also gained my cute lil lodge idol (her name is Patrice) at this vote, which I used as a safety measure throughout the rest of the game and eventually for a big move. F12 (Elizabeth) was a rough vote emotionally, but the right measure strategically as I was accomplishing both of my pre-set goals by continuing to work with Jack and remaining loyal to Dovile/Louise. It was a round wherein the best move was no move. Luckily, before the 2-2 dynamic could lead to wild rocks, we…
 * create a connection to original Hwadze: Kiley wasn’t v social quite honestly, but Jack and I connected very well working Immunity #6 and it became very apparent that with his social and strategic acumen, he was not on the outs on Original Hwadze, meaning he could be routed to around five people I didn’t know when the merge started. Knowing his situation was relatively desperate, I attempted to become a source of comfort without sacrificing my position and in doing so, fostered not only a relationship with him that would last until F5, but with his own connections once merge hit. The 5-2 numbers dynamic was v detrimental to using swapped tribes to foster connections, so it was essential not to vote out Hwadze.
 * cement the strategic bonds made on Zambezi: In voting Augusto, I had thrown myself into the middle of the new dynamic. With Ben and Elizabeth having voted Dovile and Louise and Dovile having voted Augusto, there were definitely cracks to exploit. Despite having arguably strong bonds with Ben and Elizabeth, I knew that if my strategic position on Zambezi had been unknowingly exposed, snaking around and flipping to them would only reiterate a perception of strategic insanity, hence why I decided to side with Dovile and Louise against Ben and Elizabeth.

Early Merge (F11 - F10)

''My instant merge mentality was a panic. I was at a very considerable disadvantage without knowing Matthias, Drew, Hals, Vincent, or Roisin. In my mind, the “greeting” phase of original tribes was a mentality I had to consider. Playing aggressively or hard would be noted in the initial formation of opinions of me and place a target that I did not want or need, so I tried to hit the radar, while still making a significant yet quiet impact on the course of events. In this phase of the game, my goals were to: discover, set, and maneuver the merge dynamic, as well as navigate outcomes that kept my relationship network / strategic bonds intact.''


 * F11: Based on the conversations I had, my initial impression was the dynamic was set as either OG Hwadze against OG Zambezi or swapped against swapped—either of these put myself, Dovile, and Louise into a tough spot so navigating and fostering new relationships was essential. More importantly, cracks had to be exploited. When Dovile informed me of the Jordan (Becky)/Dan/Hals/Matthias alliance, it was my suggestion that she leak the alliance to Vincent/Jack/Drew/Roisin to get a 7-4 vote on one of the four and move the target off of her—it was very intentional to have HER leak it. My goal was to break up OG Hwadze without any real trace that I had been involved. In my opinion, this led to a dynamic merge of three sides—the first being the alliance of four and the second being a shifting network of relationships, one that was difficult to navigate at times, but also useful to advance at others. It was definitely one of my larger moves and the result of building up and understanding my bonds with Zambezi (Dovile/Louise). While there was some back and forth on targets, we decided Dan because the challenge threat he posed, coupled with the fact that he would be more comfortable for the OG Hwadzes to vote, meant it was the ideal route for me.


 * F10: However, if that vote revealed anything to me - it was that Dovile was going to continue to fight hard in the merge and that fighting alongside her would tether me to her. Despite knowing the vote was 7-4, I advised she play her Zambezi idol, knowing it would be a misplay and serve to weaken and expose her for future rounds. In that case, it was this round - when the vote seemed set between Matthias and Dovile, I was willing to keep my shield around for an extra round but once the target shifted to Jordan (Becky), acceleration became necessary to maintain some sort of strategic bond with others. Since at the time my connection to Jordan (Becky) was my source to working with Matthias/Hals, it wasn’t my ideal outcome compared to untethering myself and moving towards the middle. While my role was quieter, I did secure Dovile’s fate in the game by covertly sabotaging her last minute effort to create an alliance of myself, Roisin, Jack, and Louise. While keeping Dovile was more ideal for all three of their games, it was best for mine not to be tethered and I decided to use my last-minute swing position to feign “reluctance” and sent Dovile out. 

M(essy)id Merge (F9 - F7)

''While UTR was cute for some time, it wasn’t best suited to deal with some huge threats. Admittedly, this was not my cutest phase of the game because of observations I couldn’t have made given the aforementioned swapped scenario. My goals were the systematic elimination of threats and an attempt to position myself for a dominant late-game; ironically, both of these goals were met, but not in the manner I necessarily expected. ''


 * F9: My expectation at this vote was to work with Drew, Vincent, Jack, and Roisin against Matthias to expose Drew’s position and swing on him at F8 with four others. Roisin was quiet in the alliance chat and the others were unclear on whether it was Vincent/Jack; both of these were clear indicators that people had other plans, but rehearsal is a bitch and I didn’t have the time to dig, meaning I was unaware when Drew went. The only real downside to the situation was the new 5-3 dynamic, which threw me into the minority and put the target I’d been so desperately avoiding on my back…


 * F8: Recovery is never cute, but it was something I WORKED. My immediate goal was to repair every relationship I’d fostered at that point (Jordan (Becky)/Louise/Matthias) to avoid a target. I rationalized all of the decision-making behind that round with semi-truths and really worked to rebuild my relationships. The degree to which that succeeded surprised me. When Touchy Subjects placed me as one of the better games (want to see win/best game/will win if not stopped), I was v concerned that that, coupled with the 5-3 dynamic, would result in my demise, but the majority had cracks that were relatively easy to exploit and it was clear that my social bonds were developed enough to save me from the initial target. My conversations led to both Louise/Roisin and Matthias/Jordan (Becky) approaching me with plans to turn on each other despite the initial target on me, which led to my survival. I think keeping a level-head after being blindsided and consistently reiterating my desire to still work with people kept me safe that round, and allowing me to play a key role in a threat leaving!


 * F7: Knowing now more than ever that there were three sides to the merge (myself and the straights v. Roisin/Louise v. Matthias/Hals), my goal was to keep a rivalry network (Matthias/Louise/Vincent) in the game to avoid a continued target, while also taking out someone I believed to be a late-game threat. The vote was initially on Matthias, but I believed my connection with him was solid enough, so I tried to shift the target to Hals. I definitely got it off Matthias, but after that everyone's respective ambitions led to a bunch of changes, most of which I was blissfully unaware of due to my own rehearsal schedule. Last I had checked, a plan was cemented and I could go onstage. When I came back, one of my closest allies in Louise had left. The only real consequence for my game was Hals, which I somehow flipped around into us now working together sdkjhf.

Late Merge (F6 - F4)

''At this point, the relationship network, impressions, and advantages had been relatively set in stone so for me, it was time to start playing a more dominant game. I believe that by navigating and orchestrating these votes in a more direct way than before, I got myself into an optimal combination of finalists to have a chance at winning the game.''


 * F6: My immediate goal was recovery - which I accomplished relatively well and quickly. By reiterating my desire to work with virtually everyone, I managed to position myself in the middle of the dynamic (Hals/Matthias v. Roisin v. Jack/Vincent) to create an outcome that was ideal for my game. Initially, that meant Jack going to ensure Roisin’s flip-flop strategy would cause her to work against Hals/Matthias at F5 - but when Matthias attempted to snake me, it became clear that voting Matthias would be my direction. I definitely was heavily involved with this vote—even though I knew Hals/Matthias were skeptical of me, I tried to play both sides, while not excessively lying so that I could continue to work with Hals and also sell Vincent on voting Matthias instead of Jack, which proved critical to securing Jack’s loyalty, as my initial plan had gotten back to him and thus, I had Vincent plant a lie that reversed the situation and turned it against Matthias, cementing his fate.


 * F5: Knowing Jack was a huge threat to win, I quickly realized that the amount of advantages left in the game (Nyuchi Idol / Bullseye / Lodge Idol / Immunity) meant that someone would be leaving this game in the same manner of Mrs. Cirie Fields herself—my goal was to control the direction of what could be chaotic and force it onto Jack. By winning immunity and playing my idol on Hals, I managed to accomplish this in a relatively clean fashion, taking out a threat. It was definitely a rough moment voting out one of my straights, as we had overcome a 5-3 dynamic at F8 to make F5 with majority, but one necessary to advance.


 * F4: This round is perhaps one of my craziest - because it was probably the only time in this game I faced true danger. Up until this point, my social and strategic game kept the target off my back, but when Roisin won, it became relatively clear that Hals and I were forced from idol faves to adversaries in a tragic twist of fate. Despite having a fall out with Vincent the previous round, I managed to rework my bond with him and convince him that advancing with me was his best shot, resulting in the 2-2 tie, which I then worked harder than any challenge. I literally memorized the numbers of letters, the sequencing of letters, and made sure that I would move on at the expense of my demented duo :( It’s a testament to what I was willing to do in this game to make it further… to put it simply, I would never go down without a fight.

Summary

Concise and I don’t get along, but I’ll summarize: I think the social and strategic framework that I used to advance me across the season gave me a more direct and impactful game than my fellow finalists--these impacts served to get me to where I am. I developed social bonds to the extent where I worked with every castaway (save one or two) in some capacity this season. Furthermore, I also utilized my own understanding of the relationship network to navigate and orchestrate several ideal outcomes for my game at nearly every vote. I definitely overcame adversity - the swapped situation threw me into a merge with a relationship network I had to uncover then manipulate in a relatively short amount of time. Even when I faced ironic setbacks in the game, I never let them deter me from getting here — I played for my game and my personal ideal outcome, not just my statistics. We are often our worst enemies and I was not going to let fear guide me in this game - I think I played with a tenacity, an impact, and an understanding of the game that you won’t find in the people sitting next to me and most importantly, I played

for myself,

for this moment,

''and hopefully for your jury votes. ''

Overall, I just want to thank you all so much for this experience - I am so excited to talk with you all again and hear what you have to say. I’ve missed my Kariba family so much and y’all have created the hardest of the four games I have played in. I'm not great at writing speeches, especially ones that have to be positive about myself dsjhkf, but I did try to explain my gameplay to the best of my ability. Hoping for the best and expecting the worst xoxo. 