Board Thread:Season 47 - Heroes vs. Villains II/@comment-34704154-20180611225334/@comment-26864283-20180612171033

Hey Roisin! It’s great to hear that your vote is up in the air, regardless of who it goes it, it’s good to see people coming into this with an open mind which is what the first portion of my speech was about. But anyways, let’s hop into your questions:

'  Will you now stop apologising for the moves you made in the game?' My short and simple answer to this is going to be yes. The reason I keep apologizing (excuse my American way of spelling it haha), is because I feel as if people think I was making things personal. I do not want people thinking I’m this horrible heartless monster who just ran around trying to hurt and betray people. So, my apologies are more-so towards that. I had numerous instances this season where people made VERY harsh personal remarks towards me when they left. ie: Estefana calling me an ugly piece of shit, Danielle telling me to rot, Rob saying my dick was too far up Mackie’s ass etc… So, from my perspective it seems as though people took me betraying them personally when it was not, and it was all game related. I do not apologize for any of the moves that got me to where I am today. I understand that I burned a lot of people’s jury votes and don’t intend on getting them via my speech, but I don’t want people to not talk to me after this is all done and over with because of my game related moves.

Do you feel your out of game friendships ultimately have been fatal in this regard, or any other way? Yes, I would say that my out of game friendships ultimately DID ruin my game. From the very beginning I had people like yourself constantly calling out premade relationships. It was literally the reason why I was targeted all throughout this game. Had all my out of game friends such as Evan, Rob and Sora not been in this game, it definitely would have been better for me. I probably would not have been an immediate target right off the bat and overall probably would have had a better chance at winning the game. Had I not have so many out of game friends in this game, I could have played even more freely and not worry about the stigma of “The Premade Alliance”. For example, my friendship with Mackie was not one of the ones I considered a “premade relationship”, which I’ll get to in your other question, but Mackie got targeted by my out of game friends for being too close to me. Had my out of game friends not been in this game, Mackie and I could have steamrolled our way to the end. Bottom line is that if you look at this cast as a whole, I believe that every single person had some kind of "premade relationship" with at least one other person. That's something that's very difficult to avoid in all star seasons because it's when a lot of bad blood is brought up. However, I believe that my "pregame relationships" really are what bit me in the ass this season.

Was winning not ur 1 goal? Winning was definitely my #1 goal, but is that not everyone’s? The philosophy behind Survivor is very interesting and something I thought about a lot throughout this game. Every single person in this cast from Declan to Dovile thought they were going to win this game. I can guarantee that since this is a main org season that about 100 people applied to be on this season and I was fortunate enough to be casted. All 100 of those people were applying to win. So if anyone’s #1 goal was anything BUT to win I wouldn’t even want to cast them. So, to clarify, from the moment I signed up for this game, my #1 goal was to win. I felt as though that goes to be unsaid though for everyone who is apart of a Survivor season.

'I know that this came from hosting on Argentina: explain? ' So, Mackie and I had some kind of a brief history before this org. We played on BB8 together, where I was a unanimous second boot. I’ve also hosted him twice before this too. However, I definitely did not consider us friends before this game, if anything he was an acquaintance but that’s about it. The thing with my alliance with Mackie was that we got pretty close personally and than became super close strategically on top of that. Just because I hosted him before does not mean I had any type of connection or bond with him before this season. Put it this way, just because Heather hosted me this season doesn’t mean that she’s more inclined to work with me on a future season because she’s hosted me here. Like, yea Mackie and I knew each other and spoke prior to this, but we weren’t any typer of alliance at all until we socialized A LOT and he became my ride or die.

'This really doesn’t sound like a very strong game since you’re pretty much bolstering ur fellow finalist’s game. Explain the relevance of this plz!' The point in me explaining that I wanted Sora out multiple times throughout this game was to show I was not following him. Yes, I definitely do see it bolstering his game and showing how he had to fight for his spot here. I stated it to show that I was aware that Sora was a big threat. I knew people would think Sora was using me to his advantage, but I want people to know that I was aware of my surroundings and how I was being perceived. Plus, it was a plan that I only really talked about in confessionals so no one on the jury really knew of my plans to take out Sora.

Very contradictory statements - where do u stand on this (sorta linked to first question). Pretty much what I said in the first half of this can also answer this. I’ll elaborate more though. I don’t want people to leave this game thinking I’m this mean, nasty person because I’m not. I have a pretty big reputation on the org since I’m an active admin and host around here. So, I don’t want people to feel off-putting around me because of my gameplay. Yes, it was all just game moves, but the constant attacks I had to endure really took an effect on me. I never had people react like that when being voted out and to make such low blows towards me. So, I’m apologizing for people THINKING I made this game personal IF they perceived it like that, because that was never intentions.

I hope I answered everything you were looking for, but if you need some extra clarification please ask. I understand I’m playing with the firecracker herself here, so I’m willing to elaborate even more if you need.