Board Thread:Season 50 - Kingdoms Collide/@comment-24603302-20181223015203/@comment-24114312-20181223174353

Hey Tyler!!!

I definitely don't think I played nervous or scared in any way, I realise where this criticism is coming from though. I didn't make any move involving members of the 'minority' alliance, but that doesn't mean I didn't set myself up well enough to make a move with them, or that I didn't make moves. If I needed to make a move with them, I had the opportunity - final 8 and final 5 being perfect examples. BUT I didn't take the opportunity because I didn't feel it served my game in any way - if Jenna had survived the final 8 tribal, and it was Cali, Dani and Jenna in the final 7 with Jenna's idol, that then allowed them to have 3 people out of 6 in the final 6 if they used Jenna's idol correctly. That's so scary and I saw that coming, so I couldn't do it. Then at the final 5, I thought Dani was going to get so many jury votes so I was weighing up like, do I wanna go to the end with Chelsea and Jess or Chelsea and Dani? And I chose Chelsea and Jess because if Dani stayed then I think she'd be winning right about now.

I think there's a difference between playing safe (or nervous as you described it) and actually BEING safe. Maybe at the final 8, I played it safe by playing an idol on myself - but if I hadn't and Cali had leaked the plan to Jenna (which imo was a strong possibility) or if Jess and Cali did decide to throw votes on me, I would've been eliminated 2-1-0 or 3-1-0. But I was still the one who pushed the hardest for the votes to go on someone who I knew had an idol. At the final 11, I threw a vote despite not being totally sure if my intuitions were correct - they were though, and it could've easily saved my close allies from being eliminated in a re-vote. I also flipped at the final 7 with Jared and I don't see how that's nervous at all! I didn't make a move with Dani, Cali or Jenna, but that in and of itself isn't proof of nervousness, I just genuinely never thought it served my game best to flip to them, especially because they were the faction I had proof were targeting me, while the others were not targeting me/I had no proof they were. I also don't see how I played any less nervously than Jess and Chelsea, who both voted the way everyone thought they would every round except final 11.

I didn't intend to send you on a guilt trip and I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I was explaining my reasoning, which was that the chats were hidden from me but told to Sydney. Granted, yes, I didn't tell you about the Castle idol (didn't have the merge one yet) or Sydney's advantages and that is hypocritical. My reasoning for not telling you was that I was worried you were going to side with Dani and that other alliance in general over me, and I think the whole chat situation confirmed that to me. I personally didn't view items and chats as the same, but looking back it's definitely hypocritical. A part of me wishes I could go back and redo the final 12 vote because I don't think I would've let you or Szymon become targets, but what's done is done.

You personally should vote for me because of our history on Culzean this season! We both survived a losing tribe, and at the second tribal council I was the swing but was never going to vote you off. We fought hard in every challenge but never blamed each other for stuff that went wrong and we were finally able to actually play as allies. The first few rounds you were definitely my closest ally in the whole game and I think if we didn't work together, then we both would've been pre-merge. We saved each other from pre-swap placements and then were able to make it to the merge together, even with everyone on that tribe wanting to target you, Sydney and I because we were all from Culzean. The merge definitely taints it, but at final 12 I didn't even want you gone. Regardless of what happened at the merge, Culzean was such a journey and us both surviving it was amazing, firstly because I felt we had the biggest reps of anyone this season, but also surviving it with Sydney too and ngl I did kinda think for a long time that the Culzean 3 would be the final 3.