Board Thread:Season 12 - All-Stars/@comment-5027464-20140216043406/@comment-11497002-20140216103741

Ah, the roasting challenge. I thought this might make a cheeky little return ;)

As before, this is all in good fun. But how to outline all Gerda’s faults in just one post? Luckily I have a season’s worth of confessionals to fill in the gaps so I’ll try to keep it short and sweet, just like me.

Look, Gerda is a great competitor. She’s easily one of my top 5 favourite players from Estonia. Probably even one of my top 5 favourite people from Estonia. And with Estonia’s population of… what, 12? it really does speak of her character. Seriously, where the hell is Estonia? I’m starting to think she made this place up. It sounds like one of the Pokémon GameFreak came up with that time everyone got really high.

I’m pretty sure it counts as high treason to say anything mean about Gerda. So prepare the lynch mob: I’m the one that voted for Gerda. Twice. The first time was for her Zuma flag. The second was for her Nie Mand flag. Clearly she didn’t learn anything…. Now I’m not saying her flags were bad. There’s no need to; the judges already said that for me. Never fear Gerda, I hear there’s a 16-year-old emo girl that would love to feature your Nie Mand flag on her DeviantArt page.

Speaking of deviant things, it’s odd that the proclaimed hero of this wiki relates most to Tyson Apostol of all people. But then again, I’ve never really understood the appeal of Tyson either so I guess they have that in common. But there are other qualities they share. Tyson is generally regarded as a funny, entertaining guy and Gerda is from Estonia. They also don’t have a lot of success when it comes to playing idols.

I’ve enjoyed my conversations with Gerda. She must have enjoyed them too because she shared them with everybody! Maybe her next flag can be a collage of all the conversations she screenshot. Full credit to her though: it takes a truly masterful social game to send someone a screenshot, still not be able to convince them to trust you, and then claim to have played a masterful social game. Almost as impressive as begging people not to vote you out then claiming to have ‘outplayed’ them. But Gerda always has something interesting to say, whether it’s to you or behind your back.

Gerda claims she played more consistently than Lloyd and I (whatever that’s supposed to mean). I just hope her game was more consistent than her jury speech. Apparently, despite having “one of the biggest targets on [her] back” she “never was an obvious threat”. She was much more visible than Lloyd and I yet was “not the most noticeable player in the game” and was a “silent strategist”. Gerda “always did what [she] wanted to do” like vote out Zac at final 8, vote out Lloyd at final 5, and vote out me at final 4. Time and time again, she outplayed us all. Even in the challenges. Gerda is proud to be - alongside Adam - the only player to win two challenges at the merge. Maybe she didn't pay attention during the Tribal phase but Taylor and I both won immunity long before she ever did, and both won our second Immunity Challenge before she did. Adam also won immunity pre-merge and Taylor won an individual reward challenge so... Taylor and Adam won the most individual challenges. But Gerda ties with me at two! It looks like we both outplayed each other!

She really did control the game, like when she won immunity so that Sole was eligible to be voted against. A truly daring strategy but she pulled it off with aplomb. She mentioned Uli’s gameplay to Adam at final 9 which directly led to Uli’s elimination at final 6. Another enemy swiftly dispatched by Gerda. She correctly deduced that Lloyd wouldn’t play his idol at final 5 – the last opportunity to do so, rendering it useless if not played – and hatched a brilliant plan to vote for him. It was only foiled by Lloyd obviously playing his idol. Her razor sharp strategy had outwitted Lloyd and me, which is why she now found herself helpless in a position of power, begging us to save her in the revote. She could have played her idol on herself but sometimes you don’t want to be too much in control of the game.

Gerda’s a good sport though, and god bless her spirit. She really overcame such adversity. Everyone cheered her on and wanted her to win, and she still managed to push past that all. To have made it this far with the full support of the wiki community is truly the underdog story of our generation.

Hmmm, I hope I didn’t come across as too bitchy; otherwise I’ll have to start calling myself Loki. Thank you Hickman for the chance to practice my roasting skills once more. I look forward to being roasted myself ;)