I'm a Rock and a Pillar/Confessionals

Day 4
"shiva"

- Oh my God oh my God oh my God. Chris thinks we did the Aidan vote because of Jo and Jo thinks Chris and Aidan were aligned and Chris trusts me 100% as does Jo. Holy shit this vote could not have gone better oh my God. No one knows Aviv and I took control that vote oops.

"brahma"

- Day 4 and the challenge is hard as fuck, which is fun! I'm so bad at things like this so my only goal right now is to not be the worst on the tribe, even though I'm pretty sure Markos would be the sacrifice if we did end up losing... Yesterday we finally got that long talked about me-Dean-Rob-Miguel alliance going which is great, I guess. Ronel (who is a fucking nutcase but I still like him) is no longer replying to my messages, but I guess it's good because now I don't really have any other option that to sit tight and stick with the 4 majority alliance (and hopefully neither does anyone else in it). Not gonna lie, I'm not totally in love with this alliance. Miguel annoys the shit out of me with his dictator bullshit, Rob is Rob, which is nice but there's still something off about him and I don't get the vibe I'm his #1 so I'm reluctant to fully trust him, and Dean is cool but Dean is also literally never around. I'm kinda thinking if I somehow make it merge I'll be more than happy to flip on them a little bit.

"shiva"

- song of no conext to this confessional : https://youtu.be/wqwrPFVYrJ0

ok so blake wanted a tie 2-2-2 dani leaving in revote. i thought that it was way too risky and so i made sure aidan went hope. i saw chris and aidan as decently close too and wanted that side covered and isolated. dani is probably the next target if we go to tribal she needs to go now cause as soon as there is a swap she will flip i feel.

talk with dani before results when i just woke up: (Dis c/p of our logs of what was relevent)

daniL we're gonna be voting Chris sadly

nvm were voting jo

me: Jo o.o how co.e jo?

dani: what? Jo is very unpredictable and will turn on people According to others

me: Nah now isnt the time for that He works hard I. Challanges and does well for the trib E And he hasnr been unpredicatble so far

dani: i've already switched the vote once and everyone is on board

me: Who led this vote?

dani: aidan and i Chris only couldn't compete because he was busy

me: 😕 just nxt time lets talk more before we vote cauae I just woke up and you said u lrady voted

dani: I didn't but we have a vote ready

ok aftermath of this tribal:

dani: Why didnt u inform me the vote was changing

me: You wouldnt take no for an answer so it felt hard to approach you about the flip

danit: Okay I can see that Are we still together

me: Ya I just didnt like aidan try a control shit and use meta

daniL okay I just wish u would have told me because now my vote towards Jo affects his trust in me

me: I thought you said you already voted? And you said you couldnt change your vote cause youve aready flipped too many times

dani: i didnt vote until like 1 am est

me: Read up and see how it seemd u werent gona take no for an answer about jo

dani: Alright ur right

Ame: nyways we gotta make donwith wat we got now and try our best to win the next challenge

DaniL Definitely

I feel super good about this vote. it was a good choice. Jo blake and I voting together. A strong trio on our tribe. Majority is on our side. Chris and Dani are the weak links when it comes to challenges. Chris with his busy schedule and Dani with her schedule and a little less enthusiasm towards challenges as the others.

Even if we loose immunity I'm safe and its Dani who walks home. I hope it doesn't come to that. I did well in the challenge so they can't say I didn't do anything for it :) safe!

"shiva"

- Analyses of the tribe at this point:

Chris: Barley around. Haven't tlaked much to him and i need to change that. He is close with blake a little less after this tribal cause blake said hed tie the vote but he didnt but blake acted as a mediator between chris and I and id like to keep him thinking that the only communication i hvae with chris is through him. for this to work i need to strengthen my bonds with chris lol. so far its been hard to talk since our online times have been so out of sink.

Blake: Still a sweetheart. Slightly paranoid. wanted to tie the vote 2-2-2 first tribal cause dani was sent to the temple. Nah man its dangerous to be that paranoid but its ok. later on I can use his paranoia. BUt for now Ill try be that strong pillar so that i can bounce his paranoia off of me. If someone paranoid sees someone stable and firm and not paranoid. They might feel safer and more comfortable with them cause their instability/paranoia will be calmed and soothed like water over parched throat. I want to be this kind of person to Blake. someone he can always tell stuff to someone who can calm him down and be his pillar and his support therefore he'd be less likley to flip on me because who flips on their pillar? It's like shooting the priest at the confessional.

Dani: She seems... Idk. She is nice and was great day 1 but something fell out of place with her and her game. idk how to explain it but she makes both blake and chris uncomfortable with her (which is another reason i wanted to keep dani over aidan. because the others wanted her out so badly :D extra protection! and Im hoping im the closest to her out of the others. I want to keep her with me. SHe is isolated in our tribe currently. but during a swap shed flip fast which is my only worry. But its ok. If i become her ray of hope on our tribe then if ever come a swap or if I meet her in merge I won't be on the bad side of her wrath.

Jo: Jo and I are gg. I was a major reason he stayed and he knows chris and dani wanted him out at some point. So hed stick with blake and I. Not much else to say just that I feel we can go far together (although i think i can go further with blake but his social game seems p good so others might take him away from me </3).

I just need to keep a cool head on. I'm not allowed to be paranoid. Im a rock and a pillar. im a temple. a holy temple of calm and stability! I shall not get cocky! its a temple. in the sanctum of god! do not get cocky. for there is someone above you. I shall not become the overexcited icarius but the wise daedalus.

I say this cause my cockyness fucked me up in a few games. I need to be calm here. cool. Nothing will affect my head nup. my ego will be untouched!

Amen. I will now do a drawing to represent this week and how i feel i think.

http://sketchtoy.com/67747240

"brahma"

- For this challenge I think my tribe have taken the right choices, we sat out Markos (who does not know anything about maps). And we have make good times, if we stay like this maybe we could win. The only problem is that Ronel has not answered our messages and he is the guy that knows Asia the most ! Hope we can win this too.

"shiva"

- Fuck this shit I hate my goddamn tribe we're gonna lose every competition and I'll be voted off before merge I hate America

"brahma"

- We though we had it in the bag. Dean's lackluster performance was noticed instead of mine. Getting the 2nd lowest score, I knew that I need to get steppin and dragged someone's name in the ground. Sorry babe, Markos. I'm preppin and on to you!

Day 5
"shiva"

- Im on phone plz excuse the many typos u willr witness here.

So we finally win immunity! Sadly blake and dani's score dragged us down a bitand so we didnt win the reward but its ok lol.

So ive set up saftey nets with bith dani and chris so in case of a swap id still have em while still knowing one is going home. Idk whoI id prefer going home. Blake and chris are good together seemingly they like wach other eventhan tho chris is apparently pissed at blake for voting aidan instead of dani :) love it I created this kekekek

Jo and I toyed around with the idea of goting chris out next lets see what happens in the end.

"shiva"

- Daily cast analysis:

Chris: in like fucj yeahets work, tigether. Potential to be close but feels fake and staged

Dani: she doesnt seem super kotivated or drive a bit half assed but should be nice to soinf with them

Jo: my strategy twin and hiz

Blake: paraboid. Cpose with chris

Im falling asleep lol these soare half assed

"brahma"

- Well, we lost the challenge so we need to go to tribal. This first tribal council is not that easy. I think all the tribe is going for one person, but I'm not sure that is the right move right now.

"brahma"

- We lost the challenge. It was a fucking god awful challenge too, I can't really say I'm surprised we lost. Dean was the weakest link but I think he'll be fine, I sure as hell do not want to say goodbye to him yet.

Fun story about that hellish challenge yesterday: people had been asking me about my score all day but I was busy and I didn't get a chance to actually sit down and try it until a couple of hours before it was due, so I just made up that I got 1:40 and told people that (it seemed like a decent middle of the road score). Anyway I get to finally have a go at it and it turns out I'm LITERAL SHIT. My first go was something like 15 minutes, and it was SO FUCKING HARD, I had no clue what to do so I start freaking the fuck out because I already told people I'd done it (I'm such an amazing player!!!)! I spent literally 4 hours just trying to break 1:40 so I didn't look like a total piece of shit and I finally got it at like 2am which was such a god damn relief. Fucking Kuwait, what a tiny little turd of a country. Fuck that place. On the bright side, my Asian geography is suddenly amazing. Oh, the things you learn from ORGs.

ANYWAY, we did end up losing (so my efforts were technically for absolutely fuck all) and that means nothing other than TRIBAL COUNCIL! Call me crazy but I'm hyped for tribal, I get to make a parchment, I get to lie to people (my favourite thing!!) and I get to send one of the dumb fuckers on my tribe home! Or go home myself. Either way, at least I don't have to see them again. Kidding, I love this tribe. Don't trust them, but I love them.

The plan from the Unnamed Alliance of me-Rob-Dean-Miguel is to go for Markos. It might even be a unanimous vote, because Ronel seems to be onboard. I want to work with Ronel, I really do, but he's a slimy fucker and he's been chatting up Rob & Dean which makes me a little nervous, so ideally he'd be going home before merge too.

I almost want to throw it out there to Rob that I think we should go for Ronel first, but obviously these people care about challenges & I'm not confident enough with Rob to start making waves this early. I love Rob, he's a great guy, but I just can't trust him fully. I think it's because he reminds me a little bit of this total dickhead I used to know, hahaha.

Ahh I think I might just roll with the Markos vote this time around. It's so easy. So simple. Too easy and too simple, maybe? Guess we'll find out at tribal. Ugh.

"shiva"

- I'm super glad we won because I knew that if we lost, I was going home. I feel bad for the other tribe but oh well. It ain't my ass going home with these liars. I like everyone but I was lied to by everyone on the tribe other than Aidan, who was sent home. I'm keeping my social game intact but I'm not someone who enjoys keeping their mouth shut and I really just want to explode on everyone because I don't feel all fucking happy. I'm in a really bad position.

"brahma"

- Man, I think that my boys (and girl) in the tribe I trust will keep me, but I know it's between me and Markos. Good thing is that for the most part, right now if I survive this vote, I think I can survive the next vote, even if just because Ronel is quite annoying. I think at worst it's going to be 3-3 tie here. And if it ties, I think I can swing someone on the revote. I think at most you need to be confident in what you can do, and I think I can charm this. I think I can see this going 5-1 Markos gone, but I don't really think that it will end up being 4-2 or 5-1 me being out. At this point it comes down to trust. I sincerely hope that they trust me more than Markos. Once again, if I survive this vote, I think I can survive the next. It's about getting the ball rolling. Once I start doing well, I can keep the momentum going for me. Momentum is key, and I just gotta live by my biggest motto when it comes to this. "As long as it isn't me." Sure at the start I can push who I want out, but when it comes to later, it becomes a selfish game.

"brahma"

- I just spent the last couple hours making a beautiful parchment, I'm so happy with it! More time went in to this than the last two challenges combined! I love tribal!

"brahma"

- rob is being mean to me, i think i want to flip on this dumb alliance

"brahma"

- He was a perfect pre-jury boot. Invincible, CGI, and a goat. Paalam, Markos!

"brahma"

- it's been a fun season so far, i was stupid and thought i could balance doing this and another survivor game at the same time which meant i couldn't be around very much here but i've been voted off from there so will give lots of effort into making sure i don't get voted off here. i like everyone, they're a bit interchangeable if i'm honest, i guess that's what happens when you only message and don't skype. i'm not sure who will go, i haven't really had strategic chats etc with anyone so i worry that it could be me. i threw a vote to dean as i know the least about him and haven't spoken a lot.