I Love You, Jesus!/Confessionals

Day 22
"thanonchai"

- I don't like being exposed. I don't like it. When people expose how I play this game people start to take notice. I'm the only person in the majority with no votes against them. I don't like that. I need to lay low and let everyone else fire at each other. Fuck I just want to make single digits is that to much to ask? 😂

"thanonchai"

- So last round went alrigggghtttt I guess. Hannah went home, thank god, no rocks, thank god again, and Hannah had nice things to say about me on her way out. I think Jenna and Pris really should have just taken the original offer to vote for Hannah instead of trying to pull a fast one on Yannick. Hannah would have 0 animosity towards them right now, and they wouldn't be perceived as untrustworthy. Honestly, I think my trust in Jake and Priscilla are totally done. I tried to hard to extend millions of olive branches out to them and they keep snapping them off the damn tree. Apparently Priscilla went and told Jake how I said Cliff is on my radar and I'm not super close to him, and GUESS WHAT, Jake ran and told Clifford. Luckily Clifford believes (I think) that I am staying solid and Jake is just making up tales. For now Clifford and I have an agreement to stick together as threats in this game, and to possibly duke it out at FTC. Yeah right. I'm definitely going to end that, but later rather than sooner. I can't be throwing around Cliff's name yet, I need to wait until more people are out of this game like Jake, before I can strike. For now it's just going to be a waiting game. For this challenge I think I am just going to donate 2 to 5 different people. I was thinking about dumping a ton on Cliff, but because names are revealed, and I don't want Cliff to believe Jake saying I'm turning on him, I can't do that. I think I'll throw two on Rhi, Jake, and Sim as the obvious minority alliances, then throw the remaining four on Yannick and Maya. Or maybe I could do the opposite and just give two to my allies, but I don't want to bust anyone if the minority decides to pile their coins on them.

"thanonchai"

- Rhi is someone that I ACTUALLY do trust in this game that is on the outside. She was straight up about why she voted Yannick, stuck to it, and now is transparently trying to work her way back in. She doesn't have a devious side to her like the rest of the outsiders. I really want her position in this game to improve so I'm just telling her like "make sure you are solid with Yannick and Clifford." I think now I should suggest going to Chris and Julia as well.

"thanonchai"

- fuck these fucks I'm drunk again I'm drunk

"thanonchai"

- Something I'm picking up on in this game.... no one knows how to thrive in chaos. They're timid and scared. They lean more towards their weaknesses than their strengths. They allow themselves to slip up and get sloppy. I don't know if enough people put in the early footwork to build relationships. That merge vote was insane and now there's a ring of fire. Everyone distrusts each other. Everyone has someone they want to target. Everyone has a target on their back. I'm sitting pretty nifty in the middle of the ring of fire. Letting everyone burn around me as I sing and dance. I thought I was going to be the first juror. That my game was done. And then I was given new life. And what do I want to do with that new life? Just sit back and watch everybody burn 🙂

"thanonchai"

- I decided to give 4 coins to Sim, because he's highkey irrelevant and if this helps him win, rather than help him exceed 25 like I intend, we aren't really too damaged. I put two on both Jake and Rhi because I want to increase their odds of going over 25 because I feel like most of my alliance is going to dump their coins on them. Then I put the remaining two on Maya because I did not want to give Rhi and Jake too many, and I feel like Maya won't be a target for people to sabotage so she goes over 25.

"thanonchai"

- Chris and Julia, Clifford and myself, Jace and Maya, Rhi and Jake(??), Priscilla and Jenna out of being ostracized by most of this cast, and then you got Sim.

whew what a game

"thanonchai"

- It's definitely risky aligning with different people with different deal. Right now, my solid final 3 deal is with Jenna & Priscila. Fyi, never make any final 3 deal except with them. I believed that if I take them together with me during their downturn state will gain me trust from both them. But, they are still the liability at this point. As of now, the thing that matters is me or any of them open our mouth about this deal or else my game personally will be blown up. Jake & Rhi are definitely dead for any of my deals. I want to see them gone and see them never. Cliff and I are working together finding the Idol, I hope when he decided to find it together with me, he can fully believes me now. Jace is definitely my asset right now, I'm honest with him and we are supposedly be the power duo. I hope my plan will work although it is very risky to play with almost whole tribe.

"thanonchai"

- It’s never easy to witness a false fact. It’s never easy to dribble the ball back. So I dribbled to scribble through all of that, dunking hope against hope I call this- this very moment. I came into this game as a man of integrity and I will leave this game as a man of integrity. I think most people know that deep down in their hearts that I do not deserve to be voted out tonight; however— I mean, my own team betrayed me. HOWEVER, if that becomes my reality, I want to say “Thank you” to God. I LOVE you, Jesus! And I want to say “Thank you” to the ORG and the hosting team. This has been an incredible experience. I am beyond grateful. Um, If I have offended, wronged, or wrongfully accused anyone in anyway, I’m sorry and I ask for your forgiveness. For those of you out there listening, no matter who turned their back on you, you rise up in strength, you persevere, you stay true to who you are, and you hold on to your faith. I love you all. HAVE a great summer! Deuces!

Day 23
"thanonchai"

- Clifford is championing for Priscilla to get the boot and I would feel terrible doing that. I know that Priscilla will feel I betrayed her because I explicitly told her if they are targeting her, I would flip. I really would love to take a swing at Clifford this round, but with Jake telling him the stuff about how "I'm not as close to Clifford as it may seem" or whatever, I feel like any move I try to make will blow up in my face. Interestingly enough, Julia just came to me outside of the alliance chat asking me about what we should do. Maybe she is planning on making a move with me? QUEEN, I'D STAN IT. It just can't be my name being thrown out as trying to get Clifford out. Anyone else doing so, I'm down.

"thanonchai"

- So it looks like the plan is to be straight up with voting Jake so that side thinks it's a ploy. Then we have Julia leak to Jenna that the plan is actually Rhi after we all put in our votes. This causes the others to believe Rhi is going, play an idol on her (if they have one) and the votes still going towards Jake send him home. The biggest issue with this plan is if Jenna doesn't leak it to the minority alliance then we are screwed. I am also scared because apparently Jake has a blindside of me in the back of his mind. Clifford said "oh he is now changing his mind." But that doesn't mean it is gone for good. Now is not my time.

"thanonchai"

- Now JAKE wants to get a move going. Ugh, I don't know if I should trust him. Like Cliff is smart, he knows what he's doing. What if he is just lying to the chat so we do not want to work with Jake? What benefit does Jake have by taking me out right now? He's still a target, still a threat, and now doesn't have me as a shield AT THE FINAL 11 anymore. Jake is pitching us to work together as threats and take out the sheep in this game. That is kind of a good idea because I feel confident enough in the gameplay I have shown so far as to not need to drag goats along. The issue is, who do we target? Jenna is now trying to get bonded with me which OF COURSE has to happen right when I am thinking about taking her out. Maybe if I go about it correctly she will not be bitter or angry towards me. The thing is, I still want to protect the side that I'm close with. Maybe if people like Chris start to see me as defecting a bit, he will be more open to taking Cliff out. I know I have said it multiple times, but I feel like Cliff would be the only person to outright target me. He realizes he is playing a game where he is not liked on the jury, why would he take me to the end? He LITERALLY told me "I would lose next to you." Like girl.............. You don't just say that and expect me to believe you are handing your game over to me. I know that my undoing in this game will be because of Clifford. Whether it be directly, or through his lies fucking my game up and causing me to make a bad move. Like I said previously, I need to continue to focus on my social game and go on from there. That is most important. I could not make a move the rest of the game and sit next to Priscilla at the end, but as long as I am more liked, I win.

"thanonchai"

- So I'm talking to Chris and pointing out Clifford's game flaws to him because I think I can trust him. I am not 100% sure I want to target Cliff this vote, but I am definitely opening up Chris' eyes that something needs to be done soon. He is worried that he is going to be sent home if this plan Clifford and Yannick put together goes wrong. It is so easy for it to go wrong because literally one person leaks too early, ruined. Jenna doesn't rat out what Julia tells her to Pris or the minority, ruined. I don't want it to be me or him going over something stupid like that. I told him "maybe we should take the game into our own hands instead of Clifford's." He is concerned because he knows that he doesn't have great relationships with the minority, doesn't want to stir up trouble, and doesn't feel safe throwing a name out to the minority in an attempt to get something rolling. I understand these points, and hopefully I can help him figure something out. The good thing is, if it is me pushing it on him, and then he is the one that decides "yeah, let me go get troops together" then I won't be seen as the one spearheading the vote (hopefully). I think it would be easy enough to recover from a Clifford boot, but I am worried about myself then being the bigger target once he leaves. If Clifford goes, I need to ensure someone else is taking the heat and pinning Clifford's target onto their own back instead of mine.

"thanonchai"

- I think me trying to keep Jake in this game is a futile effort. Now I am trying to think about how I can maneuver seamlessly letting Jake know, and not being blamed. I think I'm going to pin it on Cliff and be like "I've talked to multiple people and all of them are afraid to turn on Cliff and Co. at this point." That should work, right? Hopefully.

"thanonchai"

- Clifford controls this game. No doubt. He is the centre of everything and needs to have control. He will "drag" me to the end to keep a fellow threat around but that's it. He needs to go and I will get him out. He can protect me now but I will take him out

"thanonchai"

- Holy shit I am playing everyone so hard right now. Here's what I'm trying to do. I am trying to get SIM to give his immunity necklace to Jake so we can vote out sim and then I will create a three-person Alliance with pris and Jenna where we potentially swing back and forth between alliances doing blindsides. I think I'm officially connected to everyone in this game and all of them need me. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

"thanonchai"

- I feel bad that I have to vote out Rhi this time, but the idol paranoia with Jake is all too real. I'd rather it be Rhi than me.

"thanonchai"

- And NOW I am a swing vote??? Apparently they want me to flip and take out Clifford and they claim that he was the one throwing my name out first. I think I am going to spare Cliff this round and take his ass OUT next round. Jake will still be here and we will go to war with Cliff.

"thanonchai"

- FUVK

"thanonchai"

- basically my game? is a mess. i got put in the minority of 3 because two girls who have no backbones aka jenna and pris decided to flip to an alliance that doesn’t trust them and has them FOOLED. honestly it’s just sad to watch KLJFHLKFJ

just when i think all hope is lost…. AN IDOL FINDS ITS WAY INTO MY FUCKING LAP SDLFKJHHKJGDFLSHKDSFGHJKFGDKJHFGKHKFHJSDGKHJFGDSKHJDFGKJHGFHKDKJHDFSKJHDFSHJGFHKJKHJSDKHJGFJK BITCH I SCREAMED, YES I DID!!!!!!!!!

everyone is so OBVIOUSLY trying to get me to idol myself but if i was them i would make me think im leaving and then vote out rhi… LMAO dumb assses. theyre rly insulting my intelligence here… as if i’d believe that shit

anyway people wanna not play the game? i’ll fucking make them play the game. chris? aka andrew savage? you have jenna and julia around your finger and GREAT relationships with the ENTIRE majority alliance. you’re the biggest threat and the TICKET to blowing this game WIDE open.

i feel bad bc chris is playing a good game but…. i’m here to win not feel bad for people who yell at me in PMs after im in the minority. sorry!