Board Thread:Season 52 - Tasmania/@comment-28570952-20190416225956/@comment-27489225-20190417093413

Hey Ronald,

I'm jumping straight into question time. If you ever came back to play again, how would you improve your game? Well I mean thats easy, I would've freed myself up org wise to put more effort into social game because that used to be my strongest quality and now its my worst. I think its totally fair to judge my social game as critically as yall are like I get it, I'm not saying it was amazing by any means so yeah I would totally change my social approach to the game and would make some more effort.

Okay second question... Who is the real Ashlee and what does she really think of the game and all these people? Well I feel like I did an individual break down of everyone else in another speech so I'm going to keep it general to everyone and my previous speech still stands. The real Ashlee, is a 21 year old teacher who feels lost as an adult whose supposed to be settling, but is instead way to into playing orgs and travelling. I put a lot of effort into orgs because its almost like a little escape route as I'm sure it is to many of us around here. I feel like sometimes I take orgs to seriously and take peoples opinions of me to seriously, and the last two orgs have opened my eyes a little to that. For anyone who saw me in Twisted I was more myself and got an amazing reception but playing the same style game in another org I got a very different reception. I mean honestly I am sometimes a little harsh but usually not like this at all. I guess sometimes being a little over the top and saying harsh things makes me seem like a villain, and lets me control what people think of me. Its like a mask because I dont really want people to think I'm a shit human when I'm being myself.

I did however have a bit of a break down throughout this season where I was terrified of what people thought of me. It only lasted a few days but I really was super worried about this exact thing, about seeing the VL soon and all that. I dont know I was just worried. SO yes this season I played very differently to how I usually played and I did say plenty of times that I didnt care but I think the truth was I have always cared a smige to much. Okay now I'm getting to deep! I did however low getting to know everyone and I know one of the things that scared me was that I'd walk away from this with everyone hating me and thinking I was just a heartless bitch which I did portray a little but I dont know I'm just a messy human which never translates well online. But I loved playing, I loved that I got this season to have such a big realization and I do appreciate all of you and the hosts for making this an amazing season.