Board Thread:Season 38 - The Ganges/@comment-5098907-20170202222806/@comment-30203302-20170204021206

Hey all, first of all, sorry for the super long posts and delay, but I wanted to spend some time to critically self-reflect about how I felt about each of you. So here it is!!

Aidan  - I unfortunately didn’t get the chance to talk to you in game so I can’t really comment about you.

Markos  - I don’t think anyone on the tribe really got to know you, myself included and it’s really unfortunate because the few messages we had together showed you to be a really nice person. I wish that we both had made a better effort to get to at least know each other.

Chandler - I also don’t know much about you kjfhkfs.

Chris  - It would have been interesting to meet you because I have heard some great stories about you.

Aviv - <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> Fucking hell, I had no clue what to expect from you this game. It’s clear that you’ve improved immensely from your first few days on EpicMafia and that you have become a huge social threat. From what I heard, you had immense control over the original Shiva tribe and you were definitely swapfucked. I was really scared of you because perhaps unlike Dean or Ryan, you had the best idea of the game that I played and I was really worried you would metatarget me if you made merge for it or tell others about how I played. I hope you are doing well; I’m glad that you’re cutting down on the ORGs you’re playing in, I never thought 11 ORGs was healthy for you ;) Message me anytime!!

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">AJ <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> -  I think that we really connected on a personal level this game. Even though we only knew each other for a few days, I really enjoyed our conversations and it really hurt me to vote you out. I’m really glad that Blake has a friend like you who is looking out for him. I also wanted to personally thank you for the help that you gave me after Blake’s blindside because I’m not sure if it came across as genuine when I thanked you initially. I hope to stay in contact after this game is over.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Jonathan <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - Hi Panda Hat! Once again, I didn’t have much contact with you but from what I heard, you were in a pretty good position on your tribe. I hope you’re doing OK, it’s never good to see someone leave for personal reasons.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Danielle <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - Howdy Danielle! Lowkey I have been waiting a couple of weeks to say this, so without further ado... YOU PROMISED ME YOU WOULD TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF SHUTTER ISLAND BUT NEVER FUCKING DID. WHAT THE FUCK!?!? You were incredibly sweet and it was a delight talking to you; I really liked you and I was upset that you got voted out. I wish that you hadn’t voted already and I wish that we had some more time to talk.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Ronel <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - We had some incredibly personal moments and we also had some really testy moments with one another. I admit that especially after merge, there were some moments where I got incredibly frustrated with you but I think that was counterbalanced by the really personal connection we had. I could always count on you making me laugh which made me really enjoy your presence. I’m sure Issy can tell you all about how much we loved your nicknames of her ;) Unfortunately, you were a huge threat to my game and I know that my explanation doesn’t make me voting you out any better, but I did it solely for strategic purposes. Hope you’re doing better now, just keep swimming :)

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Jo <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - I am going to use a metaphor to describe how I felt about you. You were a phoenix, constantly transforming yourself and fuelled by an intense fire. You oscillated between being intensely calm and being really OTT. You were unpredictable and you added a crazy and interesting element to the game which made you compelling and fun but also unreliable as an ally. Even though I did vote with you, I was almost relieved to have seen you voted out because I think you would have flipped on me down the road and because you were just so unpredictable. Finally, I don’t know if phoenixes actually can sing, but at least in Harry Potter, the phoenix Fawkes had a really beautiful and soul-touching voice which really is reflective of your own singing abilities. Perhaps the fondest memory that I have of us is that day when we spent a couple of hours playing Roblox and I had completely no clue what was going on but  you had my back the entire game; I had a lot of fun. Finally, I hope your interviews went well today, I’m rooting for you pal.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Felicia <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - I want to send you a love letter and YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHY but I am going to refrain. You were mostly busy during the merge period so we didn’t get to talk much and even though we were on opposite sides, the few times I talked with you was surprisingly cathartic. You (or maybe your Swedish music) had a really calming influence and we almost never talked about the game which was really relieving for me because like I said, the part I enjoy about Survivor is the aspect of getting to meet new people. I was really sad to see you go even though you probably weren’t going to work with me because you had a really positive influence on the game and you always were able to brighten my day. I think you would have gone far if you had not been evacuated; you still had 0 votes on you when you left ;) Finally, good luck in EMBB!!

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Dean <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> -  Fair warning: this is going to be really long.

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<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">‘f2 me’ was the FIRST message you sent me in this fucking game. THE FIRST THING (yes I went back and checked). And I really wanted to believe it, that you genuinely wanted to take me to the end, but like your actions towards me the rest of the game, your first message to me was a complete farce.

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<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">You came into merge, you made a completely disingenuous EpicMafia alliance with Ryan and I (which by the way, BOTH of us stayed loyal to. YOU broke it). Then you proceeded to tell me about the idol and then play it on Catherine without explicitly saying you were doing so until all votes had been sent in. You refused to tell me your side was voting Ronel when I told you like a full fucking half day before votes were due. To make it worse, you straight up lied to me and told me you were voting Jo instead. I had to hear you were voting Ronel from the other people on your side and not from the person who supposedly had a Final 3 and Final 2 alliance with me.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">I then learned from Ryan at Final 9 that you had EXPLICITLY TOLD HIM to NOT TELL ME that Blake was flipping to your side to vote out Jo (which I already knew from Blake himself) when I told you straight up who my side was voting every vote. And then finally, you proceeded to try to blindside me while arrogantly telling all our mutual friends that you were going to make a big move on me and get me out to make me look like an idiot if it worked out. Fun fact, my side was not voting you and I was actually voting Cat to preserve our alliance (and also to use you as a shield) until I found out that you were voting me from Blake and Ryan.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">I don’t understand how you can possibly still be mad at me for voting you out when I was genuine to you this entire game when you, on the other hand, have repeatedly lied to me, withheld information from me, AND tried to blindside me at Final 7 when I was NOT doing the same.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">However, despite all of this, I have to admit, you played a really fucking strong game. You played hard and you played aggressively and it worked out in EMBB2 and it almost worked out this game. I told you this before but I think that you have improved greatly and that you don’t get the credit you deserve from EpicMafia players - people should stop shitting on you so much and respect you more. Although our conversations were often gamebot-ish because we knew each other from before, I really enjoyed our voice call because I think I really got to know you better as a person. I really hope you don’t hate me because I have always considered you to be my friend. You portray yourself as being this arrogant asshole when in reality you are actually a really nice person who cares about others. I just hope that I can clarify that I really did want to work with you and it was you who burned that bridge, not me.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Blake <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">- I owe you a fucking apology. I put off your ROP speech last because you were the hardest one for me to write. I know what kind of bond we had and I know what effect my actions had on you. Out of anybody in this game, I got to know you the best and I believe you also knew me the best. I can go on and on about how I’m an ass and why I voted you out, but I don’t think it would really make a difference because at the end of the day, my actions hurt you which is completely what I did not intend to do. We were really able to talk freely about anything from pirate porn to incredibly personal matters and I enjoyed every moment of it. At the end of the day, I really really really hope that we can remain friends and retain that bond that we had for the past month. Regardless of what you may think about our friendship in this game, I promise that I will be there for you after the game no matter what. I know that this may not mean much, but your strength and level headedness was very inspirational for me and I’m super glad that I got to meet you. Keep your head up and let’s catch up soon.

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">Catherine <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">- I don’t really know how to articulate my thoughts, so this speech is going to be a lot worse than the one you presented a few days ago ;)

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">I think that we had a really unique relationship, it was both trusting and untrusting in nature while simultaneously honest and dishonest which was just a really cool dichotomy. You were sneaky - I was really careful around you about what to tell you because I think you had a really good sense of information control. You knew when to not tell me something and when to tell others something I may have told you which made you very dangerous. At the end of the day, even though we didn’t work together and our relationship may have had a sense of superficiality game wise, I wanted to express that everything I told you about things unrelated to the game was 100% true. It was nice having you in the game because you too were experiencing the problems of balancing a busy school schedule with playing in an ORG (and in your case, hosting as well). I wonder what would have happened if we had ended up on the same tribe originally because I always felt that had we been sorted into the same tribe, we would have worked together and been a force to be reckoned with at merge. I enjoyed your company and I would like to stay in touch after if you want to :)

<p dir="ltr" style="line-height:1.38;margin-top:0pt;margin-bottom:0pt;"><span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:700;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;">I s a b e l <span style="font-size:11pt;font-family:Arial;color:#000000;font-weight:400;font-variant:normal;text-decoration:none;vertical-align:baseline;white-space:pre-wrap;"> - First of all, thank you for putting up with me for a full 49 days and my constant bothering of you. You scared me more than any other player in this game because I trusted you fully and completely and I made myself vulnerable to you gamewise. It always baffles me when others tell me that they don’t really talk to you or had trouble talking with you because I experienced the exact opposite. Our conversations came so easily, we could easily transition between serious and humorous (except you, you always had a problem with being serious), game-talk and banter, or laughter and sadness. I really wish Facebook didn’t remove the ability to see the amount of messages you have with people because I’m sure ours would be an absurdly large number. I really really miss you and I’m really sad that you didn’t get to vote in time even if it meant I don’t have to face Ryan in a tiebreaker and I don’t have to hear you insulting me the entire time I do the tiebreaker. I know that you have problems keeping in touch with people, but I hope we can continue talking to you each other?? Also, #Rissy > #Isob. <span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Arial;font-size:11pt;font-weight:400;white-space:pre-wrap;">Yes I made this as cheesy and serious as possible because I knew you’d hate it :)