Crush Someone Else's Dreams/Confessionals

Day 10
"cheng"

- Katie went 7-1-1 if was super tragic everyone was super stubborn. Nobody made a big deal about my light pearl which is good!!

"barbarossa"

- Things are going SO awesome!! I officially have an alliance with Elmo, Yousef, and Natalia called the Squirrel Squad and I think it's the real deal and I'm really excited about it. They're the 3 I love most on this tribe so I'm happy they all feel the same way and we're all working together. The tribe as a whole is awesome, there's not many tribes that I've enjoyed as much as this one, every person is interesting even if there's people I like more than others. Overall I think we are a cohesive group and I really do see us sticking together moving forward. The challenge was also pretty good, I think we did pretty great and we will be able to beat Cheng. And I will admit, it was lowkey fun lol. Either way even if we lose, I think we'll be fine. I think Willow has been slowplaying it, not wanting to take a side cuz she thinks it will be Calico v Cheng, but in reality Yousef wants her gone and I'm fine with that especially if all the Barbarossas on Cheng stick together. She's super nice but Elmo said she seems like the type of person who's always a swing vote and thats true, and I dont have a good enough of a relationship to rely on her in the long run. She is rlly nice though so idk but right now if we lose I think it's going to end up being her just to weaken the Barbarossas

"cheng"

- "I'm back with another confessional after having a really bad shit storm weekend and running on empty for pretty much all of it.

I honestly can't tell what state my game is in right now, lol. Let me summarize a few key points before I get into it. First, I've put together an alliance between Bradley, Myself, Ethan, and Hunter. The point of this alliance is pretty much just to help protect my ass a bit, lol. You never want to be the only guy who hasn't offered an important vote something.

I've also snagged a vote-nullifier, and seem to have successfully escaped suspicion for it! This round, I staged a freak out about being super worried that Nick could potentially vote me out next round if he gathers two votes and happens to have both powers. After that, it should be pretty obvious I don't have shit. Except I do. I considered grabbing the double vote as well, but I wanted to leave it in for someone else to use. I want them to eventually play it, and go home anyway. In that case, people should assume they also had the vote-nullifier, since what kind of idiot only grabs one power when he could have two? Sometimes not making sense...makes sense.

I'm very suspicious of Ethan and Hunter, though. In my opinion, the logical, smart move here is to work with myself and Bradley in hopes that if things go south later, we could use any possible OG Cheng connections as a swing vote to our benefit. I've been straight up with him that for me, I could potentially use Elmo to our advantage. Since they know two of us got powers, we'll be in a VERY bad spot if we swap down in numbers. Using our original tribe connections can potentially make or break our games. The question is...

Are Hunter and Ethan smart players?

I honestly don't really know. I do feel that they're playing at least two angles right now. Obviously the four Boobrosa people have been talking about just sticking together on this tribe. It was evident enough when Hunter complained about potentially upsetting his old tribemates if we didn't vote for Katie. If they choose the easy path, myself and Bradley are probably just fucked here. I'm really banking my whole game on that they'll choose the smarter option and keep the alliance strong heading into the merge. Especially for Hunter, specifically. You DO NOT want to be one of the bigger threats of a dominant tribe that pagongs another. Why? Because that's how you guarantee yourself 6th place, at best. I know some people do play for placement, but I don't. Everyone loses but the winner, so go hard or go home. I haven't argued this to him, but I've basically just shared the strategy with him, and I'm hoping he increases the importance of me making the merge with him. If I have something valuable I can offer him later WHILE seeming like I trust him, it should make all the sense in the world to keep me. We'll see, though.

They just sketch me out. This whole tribe sketches me out. I can't tell if they're just bad at making people feel comfortable, or they're plotting to secretly vote me out next and my instincts are telling me to make a counter move. Right now I feel best about sitting back and letting my more passive gameplay take the wheel. If Hunter and Ethan aren't the logical types, then I was basically doomed the moment I set foot on this tribe lol."

"cheng"

- Yay I survived the vote! Katie went home in surprisingly an unanimous decision... but there was also an extra vote for Bradley which was bizarre! Nevertheless, I'm glad I get one more day in this game and I can work toward getting to the merge :)

"barbarossa"

- "I don't want to get overconfident but I think I am on way to successfully bond pretty good 1 on 1 bonds with everyone on this tribe. I have common ground with everyone which makes it even easier to form bonds. I'm scared for Bradley and Jake on the other tribe and was debating whether to throw the upcoming challenge or nah, but it's not like I did very well on it anyway so shrug? My tribe did pretty well but I'm not sure if it is enough to win. Hope so! Tribal here could get messy because I feel like Willow would be on people's mind as a target but she has an idol potentially, due to us finding out that the blue idol is gone.

In other news, Yousef came to me with an idea to form a cross tribal alliance with two OG Calicos and two OG Chengs. I was all for it because I really want to work with Yousef, we are both going to be big targets going into merge so keeping close relationship with him is going to be pivotal. Also I love Su and Natalia, they are both so awesome and I'm glad they're the other two in the alliance.

Andrea hasn't sadly been around a lot because she works on the weekends. She got a lil paranoid that she would get targeted if we went to tribal. I assured her that I would try to protect her to my best ability, I hope that helped a little bit? I see myself going far with her in this game. We worked closely in BBUK8 and I adore her so I don't see why we wouldn't work together if our plans align. "

"barbarossa"

- Damn, Katie's gone. That's rough. I wasn't ever too close with her, and there's a good chance she would have gone home if we ever lost a challenge as Cheng, but that doesn't mean I would have liked it. She didn't deserve to go this early, and losing a Cheng member over there is a bad sign for me, because how do I know that it won't be the same over here? Well, I don't know that it won't be the same over here, but I have hope. Yousef and I talked a bit about exactly that, and he said he didn't want to vote based on tribe lines, which is great! Now we just have to figure out whether or not he's lying. He said he was worried he'd get targeted for being a returnee, and I told him (truthfully) that I didn't care how mny seasons he's played before, and that I don't think it makes a difference. So we've got each others' backs in that regard, but I'm still wary, with my dark pearl and all. Speaking of dark pearls, Bradley is a fucking liar. He told me he didn't take anything from those urns we got on Day 3, and then suddenly there's a dark pearl vote against him? Not a good look. That definitely worries me, since if I can't trust him with knowledge about dark pearls, he could very well be telling the people on the other tribe about mine. I hope I'm able to get rid of it soon without too much trouble, although rip the perfect game

"cheng"

- "I am so thankful that the last vote went off without a hitch. Me and Hunter calmed down Bradley and Jake enough (or forced their hand enough) to vote out Katie. As much as it sucked to see her leave, because when we started talking, we REALLY hit it off. It was just too little too late for me to upend my entire game to try and save her. I mean, me and Hunter could've flipped on the the rest of the tribe to do it, (And I think Hunter was actually considering it there for a while) but I managed to hold tight and keep the ship sailing in the direction I wanted."

"cheng"

- "A BIG immunity win in this connection/word game, especially after we got our asses handed to us in the previous challenge. We barely eked it out and i'm glad we don't have to crush someone else's dreams. Nick would be the safe vote, but I don't trust Hunter in the slightest and wouldn't mind seeing him be a pre-merge type boot. I feel as though one of us is going to turn on each other, and you want to be the first person to strike. As my ole fat Dad says, ""Karsten, if you ever find yourself in which you think a fight might go down, be sure to throw the first punch."" I promise he's a pretty peaceful dude!

I trust Ethan and Bradley right now, but everyone else is expendable. Liam and Nick are sort of goats right now, with Hunter being a try hard. Jake also strikes me as the clever type. Gotta keep my eye on him.

Hopefully the homie, Willow, survives this vote! Fingers crossed."

"cheng"

- "We won the challenge! It was a super close race and we just barely managed to pull out the W. I am super lucky that we didn't end up going to tribal because I would have been forced to pick a side between this festering distrust that Karsten and Hunter have for each other. And I want to keep them both in this game as long as possible since they both trust me immensely. Right now, I'm going to use this remaining time to try and calm both of them down, and get them to target anyone else. I also plan to reinforce some of these connections that I've made with my tribe mates. Right now, I'm pretty much on good terms and aligned with everyone. However, I need to keep up these bonds with people and have them continue to like me If I want to last further in this game.

I'm a lot more at ease now that I know Jake or Bradley _most likely_ do not have the idol, because I feel they would have used it to save Katie at the last vote. I now firmly believe that either Elmo or Yousef from OG Cheng have the idol that was once buried on this beach. I had a stint of paranoia last round before the vote, but that is over, because I feel confident with the relationships I've built over these last 6 days. Our bonds have been tested in the ultimate trust builder that is tribal council (And also trust breaker as well!).

But yeah, going to be pounding the pavement, because the moment you get too complacent, is the moment you're going to run into that iceberg. "

"cheng"

- I'm super nervous for the challenge, but at least now after the last tribal council we have the numbers on our side with the 5man alliance going on right now. I'm nervous about Bradley and Jake having their 4man alliance with Hunter and Ethan since they know about my double vote, and could potentially leak it to them, but I don't really see how that would benefit them as I could rally a 4-4 vote next tribal with it if they go against me, so it's all about timing now and playing my cards right.

Day 11
Nothing of note occurred.

Day 12
"cheng"

- SO im super happy we won! I think tribal would have ended with nick leaving but who knows with it if they go against me, so it's all about timing now and playing my cards right.

"barbarossa"

- First tribal council, I guess it had to happen one day. Immediately I threw out Lex's name-- he seemed like the easiest pitch to make. Willow, Su, and Elmo seemed to bite on that idea, but all of the original Calicos want Willow out now. It's something about her having possible ties to the other original Barbarossas, who might have the advantages from the 24 hour madness challenge, yadda yadda yadda... I think I almost died of boredom and frustration as Yousef was explaining it to me. What a bunch of bullshit. We all know they want her out so they can have a 4-3 tribal majority and pick off the Cheng members as soon as we go to tribal again. I was very clear with them about the fact that I knew that. I still haven't told anyone about my dark pearl, and now I'm very glad about it. If the Calicos knew about it, I'd be gone here. They'd see an extra vote for me and see it as their lucky ticket to avoid rocks. So yeah, I like Yousef but I don't trust him anymore. Willow, on the other hand, has been perfectly genuine with me and she's very sweet. Voting her out because of the thought that someone who wore the same color buff as her for the first six days of this game MIGHT have an advantage seems like such a fucking stupid idea to me. Everyone says they don't want to stick with tribe lines, but Willow is the only one acting like it. Fake-ass bitches.

"barbarossa"

- Ok so Yousef still isn't budging. I'm legitimately willing to go to rocks for this but I don't think anyone else is, so we could be losing Willow tonight. Still waiting for the word from Su/Elmo to make sure we're voting Lex, but I am not happy with Yousef. He had one fucking job. Lex literally gives me one word responses every time I try to talk to him, I can't trust him at all. I'm very suspicious of all of the original Calicos right now; Natalia hasn't tried to talk to me at all, Andrea hasn't messaged me since the swap, Yousef is trying way too hard to save Lex, and Lex is just... thank u, next. Survivor gods get me off this damn tribe

"barbarossa"

- "Willow, when/if you read this, I am so so sorry. I tried so hard to help you, I really did. I tried to convince people to go to rocks for you, I pulled out everything I had to save you. You're such a sweet person and I wish this could've gone differently. If you have an idol I will be so relieved, but there aren't the numbers to save you and I can't alienate myself any more than I already have. I wish you the best and again, I'm really sorry, I really am. I just don't know what else I can do. I'm gonna try to win this thing for you. You didn't deserve this, but people don't always get what they deserve. I feel so awful about this, I told myself all through this vote that I wasn't going to vote for you but I don't see any other options for me right now.

Fuuuuck me sideways, I can't stand this vote."

"barbarossa"

- https://thumbs.gfycat.com/AromaticSolidGibbon-small.gif

so i thought that my tribe would do well in the chall but we actualyl LOST. its so sad.... i love them all so much. but alas one has to go..... so ever since the immunity chall went out we've been talking about voting off wilow b/c she hasn't pmed me ab any game so i was like... she's prob gonna flip to og barbarossa. and there was no disagreement in that w/ ppl i spoke to.... elmo, su, natalia, lex, andrea all agreed and i thought i'd be an easy tribal if we lost b/c anita would prob agree or she would have to

and then when we have a convo it just gets rlly aggressive and i highkey SNAP. i sent her like 450 words in one message it was a mistake.....like i said im rlly becoming neda with the power hungriness and then elmo told natalia that i was being PARANOID and im just like OK? THE NEXT TIME U LIE TO ME AB SOMETHING IM GONN TELL EVERYON UR A MESSY LIAR. god. i remember the chat nickname with su! anyway.

i think about it a lot and go to bed. i then consider voting anita off b/c she doesn't seem to express that she wants to bond w/ og calico in any way, which is p like sad, but i don't blame her b/c andrea lex and natalia aren't rlly the most talkative ppl in the world. although still, willow could be loyal to andrea, natalia, and me, specifically, and it could benefit us over elmo and su's benefit from voting out willow. anita stays and remains loyal to the og cheng people, so it sounds best for my game.

natalia, andrea, and i talked a lot about this and whether or not we should vote lex out down the road b/c 4 og calico people on one tribe seemingly being in control is going to be scary for the other tribe, so it might be an option to let him go in order to improve the perception of us as a whole, rather than enable them to believe that we're all going to stick together and will be targets for them coming up soon. but, as natalia and i head to discuss this in the squirrel squad alliance chat, elmo and su are extremely defensive and try to push their own agenda on us right after we discussed in pms possibly saving anita over willow b/c we want what's best for us moving forward, so it was p rude KJLBDASKLFDAKLSM

it was so stupid too... they were like ""anita doesnt talk to us. idk how to talk game w her"" sis its just one question.... im giving yall an opportunity to let anita show her loyalty to us and give yall what u want so just give me what i want. some reassurance!

anyway, su leaves, so we will reconvene later. i talk to elmo about forming a fake squirrel squad variation alliance with only anita included so we can secure her as an ally. i consider it/talk to natalia and andrea ab it, and then talk to anita about working with og calico people. she says that she hasn't rlly bonded w/ anyone on og calico other than me, and i'm like, well that's p fucked up b/c we need to secure her as a number heading into a possible swap so i got andrea to message her as we were talking ab it (which kinda looks sus oops) and she says andrea is cool and i am hoping they start to connect... we need anita as a number so andrea needs to get to work (thats what i tell her anyway.) and then i talk to natalia and say she has to try too. i talk to anita ab natalia and she reveals that she's rlly insecure/awk and she thought natalia didn't like her b/c she friend requested everyone but her or somehing. idk if this is valid or not but natalia said she felt bad when she found out and that she didn't mean to or wahtever/i think it's possible everyone else friend requested her instead of her friend requesting ppl, but ya, i ask anita if she wants me to tell natalia to talk to her and she's like omg yes b/c shes too awk so now natalia thinks theres a possible bond forming which is rlly great.

so, ya, we're gonna let elmo and su take this little ""win"" and try to bond w/ anita to better position us later on hopefully. i feel rlly bad for willow b/c i rlly considered keeping her but w/ anita possibly bonding w/ andrea and natalia, and elmo/su being so adamant about who they wanted, and her relationships to the other tribe, i just couldn't save her

anyways i'm getting rlly nervous and thinking willow possibly has an idol + would idol me out if she had the chance b/c i'm the biggest threat on this tribe and og calico is seemingly in control so i just played a conditional idol play for myself if she plays an idol. i'm like scared shittless that this is gonna fuck up but i had to play it in case b/c i've left an idol the last few tims i've played... i couldn't do it again.

if it works then i think i'm in a good spot with everyone on the tribe and i need to see where we head from here. i don't want to leave because of a mistake i made, so i need to be on my a game. i can't make mistakes and i have to ensure that i'm spread out on all corners.

now.... i just have to pray that i live another day. i trust andrea the most at this point, with natalia soon following but ik she's smart, and then lex/su/elmo are all jumbled together. i love women. cross ur fingers yall

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/508107652975558695/537425753688506369/image0.gif

"cheng"

- https://youtu.be/v0tF1QZDHPM"