I Can Live Rent Free In Their Mouths/Confessionals

Day 19
"njano"

- MERGEEEEEEEE I played 3 times and made merge 3 times! Officially today is my 90th day in survivor main org 😍💖

The only perfect puzzle piece to finally complete my journey is 1. To reach day 100 2. Made it to the finale 3. WIN!!!

So right now I apologized to Jack he has been really really nice and I realize that late in the game. So shout out to Jack cause you are a cool dude.

I still don't know a winning moment for my position cause literally Natalia saved my butt and Natalia is saving my butt again this time cause I can't do the challenge and I can't vote since my vote was set for Jack. I want to win this game but if I will not win I want Natalia or Cali to win this whole thing. But I don't want to sit with them in the end if I want to win. I think a perfect scenario would be me, Alex and Jack. But hey I am not planning to vote Natalia or Cali cause I love them. But I know I will not win sitting with them.

"njano"

- 3 MERGES IN A ROW IN MAINNN. Always good to have that in the record books. Or better yet just 7 merges in a row in the big 3 org so cheers my dudez

Last tribal kinda blew but not really because it further took attention off me I’d like to believe. Turns out Jino and Ashlee wanted to be (Sandra voice) PLOTTIN’ overnight while the rest of us were sleeping and holy fuck lmao Jino had a steal a vote and was ready to kill off either me or Chris. Luckily my ~SOCIAL GAME~ and ~BONDZ~ and ~RELATIONSHIPS~ prevailed once more in that the target didn’t fall on me and Natalia being my fucking savior ratted this whole plan out to me because they planned to bring her in. Didn’t take much thought to say fuck it and that either Ashlee or Jino had to go, after a couple of rule technicality clarifications we knew the votes were there, decided to let Jack know too and voila, we got out Ashlee. I said on Day 1 I had some sneaking suspicion she was this wolf in sheep’s clothing and as the second swap came around and she just faded further into the background I FIGURREEED she would be up to something again, and honestly I owe it to Natalia too though lmao she called this before I could bc I was still in the mind of thinking Ashlee would wait til merge to go crazy with her shit.

So Gerda left which is a little less than ideal because I figured she was a number in my corner and now predators are down 7-4 at merge. Luckily though there’s a gafuckinzillion fractures among prey, and while I do see an inevitable fissure between us I do think all the predators should be voting together for a round or two this merge. These dark pearls and auto votes are keyyyy and sadly I fall into one of those holes having Nicole auto vote against me. LUCKILY, I think the people that would or have made a move against me have their votes already auto locked in so yea hope I’m gucci. Ideally Chris too can win this first IC and he shares me the clue so we find this thing.

I honestly don’t know who to roll with moving forward at merge. I feel like Chris and I can be on an island down the line, the trust is still there but unlike last season I’m not putting all my eggs in one basket. I feel like next to Chris I have extremely close relationships with Natalia and Nora, then most of the cast I’m friendly with, with a couple people I still need to speak to. Nicole’s super nice and easy to talk to but no I’m def not forgetting her vote anytime soon. I have to slowly but surely build back the relationship with Jino. Long term, I know Natalia’s squad would include people like Trent and Cali and she’d want to bring in me and Chris as shields, but I also know Nora is thinking predators go strong and bring in like Nicole or some bottom feeders. I honestly want to wait for that war or decision to happen and hope there’s an easier first merged boot this time around (just like the last time lmfao tbt to that shitshow)

Like honestly it’s funny bc I’m not saying Alex or Jack are these awful shit people but their woe is me narratives have kinda just lost their weight the more people I talk to, like it sounds like their social games are just rigid and that’s probably why people are put off. I know their plans are to say fuck it and roll with the flow anywhere but I hope people catch wind of that and see how that can be a dangerous thing down the line. So maybe that’s the direction I’m leaning in but there’s 48 hours for someone or something to blow up.

Last but not least can I say ITS GLORIOOOUS to hear Ashlee call me the UTR king, okay terrifying bc now maybe people are catching on, but whatever I just plan on hanging back in the shadows and around F7-8 Retribution Evan is being unlocked once more. The problem was getting my foot in the door to get there. Now, I think it’s doable.

"njano"

- []

"njano"

- So I woke up this morning, saw that we merged and just thought to myself

“Hm. I’ve decided I’m going to win this game”

And how you ask? Well right now I am in a tribe that has several clear groups. For example, Nora, Will, Nicole, and possible Jack are a clear block, and so are me, Natalia, and Trent (HOT THREE HEADED SNAKES SUMMER YAS)

So what I need to do is ensure that everyone that I want to work with in this game is actually going to be on the same page with not only me, but also each other. This includes Trent and natalia, as well as Jino and Alex (I mean he literally saved me from that mess of a tribal last round)

However, with all of this said that does mean I’m gonna have to be very lowkey about this all. The last thing I need is people seeing me as the “one making the moves” so if I need to pin either Trent or Natalia as the person instead I’ll gladly do so

"njano"

- I got.. pranked by jake... I THOUGHT the auto tribal WAS REAL and I was going to literally cry like at first I was like no Nicole we're merging at 11 and this is just a joke but then they left it up for way too long made an actual chat and had an actual one world picture for it and I was getting paranoid... phew though i made merge and it's actually a surprise this time this is my first org in a while afterall turns out i still got it maybe!! I feel like I've made decent enough social connections to at least make the mid merge but then again social connections aren't everything in this game. Natalie and Gerda clearly made good social connections with me but they still went home despite of it. I don't want to be seen as a huge physical threat for sure, luckily there hasn't been any like flash games or anything like that where i would like solo carry like if it was 2048 lil old me probably would've been obsessed with winning and done like 120k. so luckily survivor gods haven't thrown one at me yet.

"njano"

- Ashlee went which is no surprise at all the numbers weren't in her favour, I was really expecting someone else to go before seeing the revote though either jino or Chris Ashlee kinda came outta nowhere. I definitely want to find out what happened from everyone's point of view. I haven't talked to anyone yet I wanna give it a few minutes before actually approaching people but girl Evan called me out in the chat and I feel ATTACKED! he seemingly isn't actually that pissed about my vote though so phew? I don't know.

"njano"

- I won the duel! I picked a predator urn and I got rock draw immunity so I guess I'll be forcing rocks sometime during this game xoxo. but seriously I want something seriously useful and I haven't gotten anything that is immediately useful again the vote someone after u go home is bs and useless when it comes to me winning this game. I can only use it as a chess piece to gain leverage and trust and it ain't even that effective as that. the rock draw immunity is so situational so it isn't that useful either. anyway, Trent has two wins too he has "GIVE SOMEONE A STRIKE" rofl wtf LMFAOO and skip a tribal which is so useful like that's basically immunity for a round. I don't know whether or not to actually believe he got give someone a strike but he said he's gonna random.org and use it so when I see it I'll believe it.

"njano"

- "I talked around! It's time for Nicole's merge opinions/other extra stuff.

Alex He's really sweet and probably loyal to me. He's voted with save us for the past few times and we have a separate alliance with him but without Chris. wow, there are really three versions of save us out here. I definitely want to work with him going forward and I feel as though he trusts me.

Cali She picked me for the rock, that's a good sign. I didn't actually get to talk to her that much before. she's also in CCBD so she's a potential good ally going forward, she didn't attend the last tribal or like any tribal period except for the amir one so her loyalties aren't clear yet.

Chris He was an essential part of save us obviously and I love him. I love talking to him and I love how he calls people out lmao wish I had enough balls to do that as well. His loyalties are a bit unclear to me as well I think there's a large chance that he'll stick with save us though. He has been spilling a lot of tea to me but I haven't confirmed most of the information he's given but I don't see a reason for Chris outta all people to lie.

Evan I wIlL bE wRiTiNg ThIs EnTiRe SeCtIoN iN aLtErNaTiNg CaSe To AnNoY eVaN wHeN hE rEaDs ThIs CoNf *iF hE rEaDs ThIs CoNf. AcTuAlLy, He WiLl BeCaUsE hE wIlL bE cOnTrOl FiNg HiS nAmE aS sOoN aS tHiS ePiSoDe CoMeS oUt So XoXo. I aCtUaLlY eNjOy OuR cOnVeRsAtIoNs So MuCh LiKe NoT eVeN gOnNa LiE i'vE oNlY bEeN tAlKiNg To HiM fOr LiKe HaLf A dAy AnD hE aLrEaDy BeAtS oUt LiTeRaLlY eVeRyOnE eLsE iN tErMs Of ThE eNtErTaInMeNt DePaRtMeNt LiKe SoMe Of ThEsE pEoPlE aRe GrEaT aLlIeS bUt ThEiR pMs ArE sO dAmN dRy.

Jack We're in pharohoes together but I don't know if that alliance will ever be actually serious. he didn't tell me and will about his advantage (Which I now know is a light pearl) and he probably distrusts us after hearing about save us but he's not a major threat to my existence as of now.

Jino he's kind of a mess but a loyal to Nicole mess so. his play last tribal was so very questionable but it's ok I still think I have his loyalty. so even if ccbd blows up I still have him. I think he may be a target in the near future due to pissing off a bunch of people eg jack. I see it as completely possible for me to become his closest ally again within the next few days. Just need to make sure he doesn't sleep too much or like I'm online during his waking hours i-...

Natalia I see her as a bit of a threat tbh. It's obvious that she's at the top of preys and clearly a good player. Hopefully, I can get her on my side, also she's a member of CCBD obviously so hopefully I get that alliance going again. We bond a lot personally though so that may help me out.

Nicole Wtf who's this irrelevant person literally never talked to them before should've put my auto vote on them.

Nora she's treating me like a lil baby bear and I genuinely think she would take a bullet for me and die which is shocking. she has me in her final plans but as to if I want her sitting next to me? I'm undecided. she's the centre of save me and pretty paranoid for someone who calls basically everyone else paranoid. she omits information from me until I ask and it's kinda shady but meh.

Trent I thought he would be trustworthy and my gateway to the other side but apparently not. according to Chris, he has been throwing me hard out under the bus every time he's been kidnapped which is such contradictory behaviour since he's told me about all of his advantages and the idol clue and literally everything tf is this mess. I'm looking to cut him loose within the next few rounds I can't afford to have this.

Will He's going a bit inactive right now since he's off to uni but he has that idol which he WILL be sharing with me but he's placed a target on his head by targeting Cali and apparently Trent doesn't like him either, rn he's a vote an ally and a massive shield.

I have a feeling this first merge tribal is going to be absolutely wild and I won't have any direct say because I'm stupid and put my vote on Evan."

Day 20
"njano"

- i got stabbed

"njano"

- So I am sensing that the reward challenge today has a lot of items from the remaining urns. So I am scared right now and nervous but hoping I will get at least one beneficial item.

Last tribal was a mess but this time I will just stay loyal to Jack, Chris, Evan, Natalia, Cali and also probably Trent.

I trust Nicole before but I don't know where do they stand this season will be going to be unpredictable cause I really don't know where do everyone stand so it will just keep getting messy and messy. I am scared but I do really want to win! Let us just watch the beautiful view... Cause I can't really do anything this round.

"njano"

- so the first challenge is auction right up wow more advantages hopefully they're as useless as the current ones. also, the idol system is the bridge but it's only 40 planks or whatever so obviously the trials are black afterwards at least 40 planks is manageable unlike a 9 digit code and then trials. it seems as though Evan got the code on predator though somehow but it seems as though he hasn't gotten the idol. he's the only possibility otherwise the only idol in the game is will. speaking of which he made a really dumb decision and decided to tell Chris lmfao me and Nora raged about that for a bit but whatever, not a biggie he's probably gonna end up using it this round or the next anyway because he has such a huge target on his head for apparently saying *eta*d to Trent and also voting Cali. I want this merge idol all for myself though or at least Nora.

"njano"

- "I haven't been able to connect back with Natalia/Cali/Jack game-wise yet but I have with Jino and Chris. I will be messaging the CCBD chat tomorrow when I wake up and I'm very interested in the reactions. Jino told me about literally everything that happened on his tribe and he was unintentionally a mess, this tells me that I still have his trust and his loyalty. anyway, I'm pretty sure I know every single advantage in the game right now...

Kikuyu Idol: Will

Torrobo Idol: No One (a very small possibility that it could be Evan.)

Kidnap #1 (White Pearl): Jack

Kidnap #2 (Cursed Vote): Nicole

Kidnap #3 (Tribe Splitter): Will

Kidnap #4 (Steal A Vote): Jino

Kidnap #5 (Tribal Pass): Trent

Kidnap #6A (Rock Draw Immunity): Nicole

Kidnap #6B (Strike): Trent

I might've gotten Trent's ones in the wrong order but regardless those are the two he has. He already used the strike and Jino already used the steal a vote. Jack's white pearl is about to get used so that leaves Trent's Tribal pass and me and will's stuff.

This is about to change after the auction though but I don't think I'll have any big problems finding out who has what. "

"njano"

- Nora has been telling me that she wants to vote out Trent next round so I told her about his pass and she already heard about it so clearly he's telling plenty of people. Chris has been telling me that people are saying that I'm a big social threat and I replied with biatch where?? but obv I know everything that I've said and I'm obviously about to start playing both sides but they don't have to know that. I won't get my vote this round so I won't have to decide but I'm hoping the save us side pulls through and votes out Trent if he uses his pass then he's just doomed the next tribal since he has that dark pearl and has to vote Jack. Nora's backup plan is Jack though, I need to convince her not to do that. It'll be hard since Nora disregards all of my logic when I try to explain things to her or just straight up doesn't get it zzz.

"njano"

- ThIs CoNf Is DeDiCaTeD tO eVaN sO iT wIlL bE iN aLtErNaTiNg TeXt. I'Ve BeEn ReAlLy EnJoYiNg TaLkInG tO hIm, I fEeL lIkE wE jUsT hAvE tHiS cOnNeCtIoN. i ReAlLy WiSh We MeT eArLiEr In ThE gAmE aNd GoT tO bUiLd Up A rElAtIoNsHiP oVeR tImE bUt MeH iMmEdIaTeLy StArTiNg To BuLlY eAcH oThEr WoRkS tOo! I hEaRd FrOm NoRa ThAt He AcTuAlLy WaNtS tO wOrK wItH mE aNd He's AcTuAlLy ThE oNe WoRrIeD aBoUt BeInG tArGeTeD bY mE wHiCh Is GrEaT nEwS sInCe I wAs MoRe WoRrIeD aNd I hAvE nO iNtEnTiOn Of AcTuAlLy TaRgEtInG hIm. BuT yEaH tHiS iS mY eVaN "ApPrEcIaTiOn" cOnF aNd AlSo He ChAlLeNgEd Me To A dUeL oF tHiS tYpInG gAmE cAlLeD z-TyPe ThAt I'Ve LiTeRaLlY nEvEr HeArD oF iT. i WiLl RePoRt ThE rEsUlTs ToMoRrOw, HoPeFuLlY, i BeAt HiS cOlOuR aNd ViSiOn BlInD kIrItO sUpPoRtEr MiDgEt SeLf.

"njano"

- Quick one before I get to studying all day at a fuckin' Starbucks

I see this game in factions now, lemme try to map this shit out

On one side you have Natalia's troops in Cali and Trent. I say Natalia's troops just because she seems to be in the best position among them, Trent is also strategically aggressive but can be shaky socially and Cali I legit sometimes wonder why she applied this game. That sounds awful and don't get me wrong I've liked her when she speaks but if she really just wants to waltz and skip to day 39 on the account of just all capsing in my pm's I'll see it through so that she doesn't break the days record. MAYBE I CAN IF I GET TO DAY 39 AND RUN IT BACK THE NEXT ALL STAR SEASON LOL JK

But then on the other side is Nora Will and Nicole. These were the tightest from Kikuyu 3.0, Nora is still a huge social butterfly (still one of my closest allies), Will has been busy with uni HOWEVER he carries an outstanding amount of power in the game with an idol and his tribe split item that can essentially throw everyone in for a loop, then there's Nicole who while she panicked and voted me I've built a decently strong enough bond with off the top.

Then there's the floaters and free agents. Alex would probably lean with the Kikuyu 3.0 folks, I think Jack just wants to see the world burn, and Jino is just looking for any sort of protection - my bet is he'll go back to Natalia's troops.

Then there's me and Chris, two winners, two hall of famers, smack dab kinda in the middle. Fucking horrifying.

I touched upon this with Chris earlier but honestly it does behoove us to be willing to go the Nick/Sora route and just cast votes in opposite directions and make people think we're not together. I honestly do think it can work because actions will always speak louder than words and I do trust him enough where he wouldn't bone me (FOR NOW).

My thing is I think I feel inclined to lean with the Nora/Will/Nicole side of things just because I do think all the predators need each other for now and because Will by default has the power and can be the HBIC. I do think he's closer with Nora and Chris than me but I can still build that bond with him and catch up, but a few rounds down the line I already foresee myself fighting an internal war between either wanting to cut him and trust to run it with Chris or keep him for camoflauge.

My thing is I want to go about this in a route that won't sever my connections with Natalia's side either. I do think she's still the one I'll tell a lot to (but not everything) and as long as she's not the one being targeted idc I'll vote Trent or Cali in a heartbeat.

ALL THAT BEING SAID, IMO, the floaters are the most dangerous rn bc they have nothing to lose and they WILL make it to the end if this side by side war happens (and I know it will soon because Nora/Will have it out for Trent and vice versa). For MY game, I would really really REALLLY like it if a floater can go this round by using fear of all the dark pearls/advantages/auction items out there. I want the war to happen don't get me wrong, just not yet. And I'll still be surface level friendly with the floaters but I want them gone lol

So that's all for now, also in the ideal world I need Christopher to win this fucking immunity and we can pounce on that idol soon

"njano"

- My days are fully mixed up lol.

Anyway! I’m soooo happy I made the merge! I wasn’t able to do it in Retribution and I was worried that I couldn’t do it here for a short while, so it really does feel nice for me to be here.

I’m pretty surprised that Jack chose to kidnap me last round as well. Grateful, but surprised. I’m hoping to take that as a sign that he wants to work with me, but it’s hard to say because he remains pretty quiet. So for now, I think the current talk of the town is that we’re going to try and get Jack off (lol) because he’s already got those proxy votes and a dark pearl against him. It’s a pretty easy vote.

For now, I’m concerned about my social game. I’m really trying hard to make sure everyone gets enough of my time but with 11 people on the tribe, it really isn’t easy for me lol. That being said I feel like I have pretty good relationships with everyone right now, and I’m careful enough with my deals that I’m not gonna get caught in something I shouldn’t be, which I think can hopefully propel me a couple rounds before I need to take a definitive side. I’d say I’m in a pretty decent spot.

We also just had an auction which I’m sure is just to get rid of those leftover Menengai items. I’m hoping I got something good, if at all, but the anonymous bidding of course makes things unpredictable. I’m not stressed

"njano"

- Quicke confessiosh for the kids

me and chris talked things out and we're cool me trent and natalia and lowkey legends and we will slay KNOW THAT

people I need in this game rn to benefit myself Jino, Natalia, Trent, and chris? maybe

people to keep at arms reach Nicole, Evan, alex

people who voting out would provide a benefit to myself Jack, nora, will

"njano"

- []

Day 21
"njano"

- I AM IN THE FINAL ROUND FOR THE IDOL! So I do hope I will get it cause this would be just amazing. Like after using the vote steal I feel so vulnerable this time. I still do hope I would be safe this round so wish me luck! and 8 days to go before day 100!!!!!!!

"njano"

- []

"njano"

- ANOTHER QUICKIE CAUSE IM FRUSTRATED

Before I get into it just wanna send out HUGE appreciations to trent, natalia, and jino. Even if we all go a direction that I don't personally agree with, they are awesome and I look forward to calling them all iconic friends after this game

NOW LETS GET THAT NICE SHIT OUT OF THE WAY CAUSE WHAT THE FUCK

So essentially, Mr. Will I Am, dora the nora, and Nicolette are a group with some other groupies on the side. tbh I would go through and name them all but im at school dying over this immunity challenge so unless your paying me, I aint saying shit

so they wanna target me, trent, and natalia, in particular they wanna target trent. sure. ok werk. none of us 3 are remotely threats but if u wanna rlly waste a vote on us 3 then go tf ahead

BUT YOU WANNA KNOW WHERE THIS ALL CAME FROM??

DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??

HM??

COME CLOSE...

. CHRIS ASS

And you would think "wow cali that's great and all you really want to work with him right"

Yes I DID want to work with him...before he basically told natalia that he wouldn't vote out Nicole and will because they "saved him".

BUT THE KICKER IS THEY STILL WANT HIM WITH US. Guys, if homeboy was willing to be solid and settle in with us, HE WOULD BE SOLID WITH WHOMEVER WE GO WITH. Why are we going to make our votes so reliant on what 1 person who isn't even fully with us wants to do??????

"njano"

- nvm ignore my last 20 minute confessional nicole is the liar

"njano"

- Wanna know what is the tea... I DON'T HAVE THE FREAKING IDOL! AFTER HOURS OF SEARCHING 😭

"njano"

- Update: Will says Natalia and Cali want me out, Chris confirms that is quite plausible. We'd barely have enough votes to keep me but if everyone still eligible (Nora Will me Chris Evan) holds true, I'd stay. What pisses me off is Will says it's because they don't want a straight male to do well. First of all, stop playing identity-based strategy in Survivor it's 20 fucking 19. Second of all, I HAVE BEEN THE FURTHEST THING FROM WELL THIS ENTIRE GAME??? HELLO??? WHAT SEASON HAVE YOU BEEN PLAYING BECAUSE I'M GETTING THE SHIT KICKED INTO ME IN THIS ONE. IF YOU DON'T WANT A STRAIGHT MALE TO DO WELL GUESS WHAT, YOU ALREADY GOT YOUR FUCKING WISH!

"njano"

- So MaYbE i LoSt Z tYpE aNd MaYbE bY aBoUt 1000 PoInTs.. BuT iT'S oK.. i'lL iMpRoVeMeNt AnD i'lL bEaT eVaN nExT tImE i'lL pRaCtIcE! oH gOd ThIs IsN'T sOuNdInG gOoD lMaO aNd YeS eVeRy SiNgLe CoNf I mAkE aBoUt EvAn WiLl Be TyPeD oUt In AlTeRnAtInG tExT dEaL wItH iT! tHiS iS mAyBe ThE sHoRtEsT cOnF i'vE wRiTtEn ThIs SeAsOn

"njano"

- "regarding the bridge, Nora and Will gave me the path to the end and I managed to make Nora say vodka and I did the puzzle pretty quickly so I'm up to the FRICKING 20 HOUR ENDURANCE NOW.

TWENTY

HOURS

there goes all of my sleep lmfao.. I'm going to get this idol no matter what. I don't think anyone's ahead of me except for maybe Evan... Nora told me ""he asked me weird question at around the same time as you"" which is very concerning and then Nora told me he failed the puzzle. IM SORRY WHAT?? MR ULTIMATE HOPE ""BIG BRAIN"" 150WPM TYPING SPEED EVAN FAILED THE PUZZLE I COULD DO?? I don't buy it at all LMFAO. so he might be ahead of me but he's still lab obsessed so hopefully, me and my no lifing skills can beat him."

"njano"

- I AM... SO DAMN ANGRY RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE NO IDEA. so I'm here telling Nora about my idol because I trust her right she's my number one ally right?? and then she goes and tells CHRIS that I'm doing the endurance. sorry what?? you're going to tell the most dangerous player in the game about my idol?? so then I lied to him and said hell nowhere'd you hear that and then that resulted in this confrontation by Chris. I still love him but wtf he's so fighty and like confronty and I hate that. so yeah I'm in a very tough position at the moment because I don't want Chris to know I have the idol but I don't want to lose his trust either so Nora is basically ruining me and I'm never telling her anything of importance literally ever again.

"njano"

- I'VE... BEEN SPENDING.. THE PAST.. 3 HOURS... TRYING TO TELL NORA TO NOT TELL CHRIS AND GUESS WHAT I FIND OUT FROM CHRIS AFTER THE 3 HOURS! THAT SHE ALREADY TOLD HIM! WOW FUN! but the funny shit is... he doesn't believe her LMFAOOOOOOOO SHE MANAGED TO MAKE THE TRUTH SOUND LIKE A LIE HOW DO U EVEN DO THAT I'M SO DAMN CONFUSED LMFAO. so basically I tell Nora to lie to Chris and say that it was a miscommunication error and then she's like ok and say that in the group chat and then she's like idol ruining my game! and I'm like bitch how if u tell him about this idol this ruins both of our games. like she's completely devoid of logic I'm trying to reason with her and she just completely ignores it (I now know that she already told Chris at this point so it was just a waste of my time) Chris is leaking every word she's saying to me because he doesn't trust her and thinks she's the liar and actually on the endurance herself and trying to get him to stop by using me as bait. so basically Nora ruined her trust with both me and Chris when that didn't have to happen she literally could've just listened to me and lie but nah she decides IDOL GON RUIN MY GAME LMFAOOO and decides to start telling the truth but no one believes the truth bc she said it in such a shady manner I don't even know anymore I just want her gone bc she's so damn messy.

Day 22
"njano"

- Where do I even begin with this nonsense LOOL, like I feel pretty safe this round but holy hell fuck this vote.

First, I’m sure there’s been enough confs about the idol shenanigans. I am the fucking worst for immediately backing out of the search because I THOUGHT Nicole was ahead of me. When maybe she wasn’t and I could’ve stayed up a full night for it. I don’t exactly have to recount every little detail I remember but there was a giant game of telephone of he said she said between Nora Chris & Nicole about the idol hunt and I’m thanking my lucky stars I was asleep then because everyone got out of their with broken hearts and crushed egos. As to who has the idol? I’m still 100% sure it’s Chris or Nicole. Neither of which are ideal. On the flip side though, I feel like Nicole and I hit it off really well! She reminds me of Pris/Claire who I both unconditionally were loyal to in past games .. BUUUT I also know Nicole can be a little more cutthroat and she’s more than likely locked in with Will. But I do think I can get Nicole to like me enough to not target me for now.

I feel like the game I’m playing is literally … FCKING CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SAYING THIS, but I’ll have to play just like that WENCH JAMIE slash DECLAN’s game from HVV2. In the terms of a former winner with a huge reputation coming in and having to downplay their threat level and hope to coast along at merge before turning it up. I say this not just in terms of that strategy but also narratives, bc now I have to consider the real possibility of Will and now let’s say Chris both having idols, and if you put a gun to my head I would say I bet they’re extremely close rn. Nick and Sora having idols put Declan in the backseat, and I feel like I’m having to sit there rn. Idols are power and all it takes is enough fear-mongering and the looming threat of it to make you play conservatively. And unfortunately for these next few rounds I have to lay it low and either plant seeds, wait for a crack, win immunity and then go for the swing, or just wait until those things expire and I kick their ass.

What’s scary though is a lot of people are looking at me for their votes. Chris is the public swing vote but I’m also in a tricky spot. The story now is most of Kikuyu 3.0 wants Jack, most of Torobbo 3.0 wants Trent. Natalia also has a double vote. The way I see the votes rn are

Jack: Jino Trent Cali Natalia (times two potentially). Light pearl and dark pearl cancel. Trent: Dark Pearl, Nora Will Jack Jino: Alex Me: Nicole

Where me and Chris have to fucking decide what to do. What I do know is that it’s best for my game rn to take out Jack just because I know for a god damn fact he hasn’t been giving me NOR Chris anything to work with, like holy shit I haven’t spoken to the guy since merge started. While Trent can be shady and have his people, allow me to say in my Aubry voice, “The devil you do know is better than the devil you don’t know”. And I don’t exactly know if Jack literally wants to do nothing rn or if he’s just snuggling up with the Nicole/Will side of things. What I do know is that I’m not in his plans.

Chris is the man of hour this vote and in the ideal world we can convince our predator group that look, Jack has to go this round because he hasn’t been offering us anything and then promise to go with them next round and bring in Alex and Nicole. If he doesn’t, and he really does want Trent out, then I’m in a VERY sticky scenario, at which point I’ll have to backtrack this to Natalia, and somehow spin it to her that we have to let Trent go and wait for the deck to be reshuffled. But what I’m concerned she’ll do is just say no fuck this Evan we don’t need Chris I’ll just use my double vote. At which point then I BECOME THE SWING VOTE AND MAN OF THE HOUR. OR PROBABLY MINUTE AT THAT TIME. I honesty do think I may just say fuck it and vote Jack then and hope to do damage control after but I’ve spent way too long trying to meticulously build my connections and securities and I don’t want to just draw a damn line in the sand one vote into the merge. SO. Hopefully I find a way out of this shit

"njano"

- my entire game rests in the hands of chris blue and i’m not happy about it.

i dont really get why ive been targeted but my name is going around YET AGAIN according to chris, i’m trying to keep my cool about it but i dont know if theres much i can do to save myself other than find the idol. in theory i should be staying by a one vote margin but chris has me seriously in a state of panic ;-; i’ve worked so hard to get to this point that it would kill me to be sent home this early... i guess we’ll just have to see #pray4trent.

i wanted to say more but im stressed and cant remember anymore

"njano"

- []

"njano"

- Oof ok every time I come here I always have a lot to say so yeah no surprise I again have a lot to talk about. So first of all, remember when i kept being like confused in my confessionals about how it is that i managed to get this big target put on me since early on in the game? and i wasn't getting it because I hadn't done anything to make myself stand out? Well. I have figured it out lol. Ever since Natalie was still in the game, Trent had informed me that Chris had informed him that Natalie and Nicole had been spreading rumours of Trent Cali and I being a group that was "running the game" and that we were "unwelcoming" and "exclusive" of other ever since they were swapped on Torrobo 2.0. And after I saved Chris last round he told me himself all the shit Natalie and Nicole has said about me and that that's why he was like hesitant to talk game with me because he didn't know how i was but that now that he's met me he has formed his own opinions and sees that they were wrong about what they said about me. I mean I always had a good perception of Natalie while on Kikuyu and I thought of Nicole as an ally as well. So it was pretty shitty to hear they've been dragging your name through the mud since the beginning of the game almost. I had never plotted against them or even said anything about them, certainly never spoke a bad word, but I guess they were threatened by me and wanted to secretly plot how to take me down as soon as possible. I choose to focus on my game, and how to make MYself better, but if ... people want to focus on me I mean, go ahead. I can live rent free in their mouths. With this information now, it made sense why they called me "HBIC" on my burn book page, i mean, clearly Natalie and Nicole had been making me out to be this villain that was running the tribe. I see the game benefit to them, it makes sense for them to use the swap to fill the Torrobo people's heads with nonsense so that eventually at a merge, they would team up to come after Trent Cali and I, and keep themselves safe. However the unwelcoming and exclusive towards other part is extremely annoying because anybody who's MET me, knows I am not that person. Come after my "game" all you want but let's not bs about my character. Anyway. Then last tribal happened where the vote tied and then Ashlee went home. The tea on how this happened is also kind of a long story, so I'll try to summarize from my perspective. So basically, the night before tribal day, I was on call with Evan just like doing our typical round discussions about what's been going on and how we feel ab the game, and I mentioned to him that out of Jino (Jack's target) and Ashlee (the other option that wouldn't be me him or Chris), I really wanted to do Ashlee because I found her a very dangerous but undetectable player in the game. I knew she was setting her game up using the same inactivity tactics she used on Tasmania but that she was also playing a lot of sides which made me question her loyalty at the merge. Evan was very hesitant but I was like trying to make him see that she comes across as a non'factor on purpose but behind the scenes she is actually doing a lot. But I also didn't want to push too much because I didn't want Evan to feel like I'm hard to work with bc i only want to do plans my way so we kinda just said let's see what we hear tomorrow and see where we go. So then I woke up in the middle of the night to messages from Jino saying Ashlee and him want to make a chat of us three to figure out a plan to save him and vote out a big player aka Chris. I was not really excited to get Chris out because I saw him as a shield and I also had a plan of getting close to him so he could protect me at merge but like at the same time, I wasn't willing to vote out Jino or Evan. and nobody had even brought up Ashlee's name which was wild to me but ok. So I figured I'd settle. But then. I got word from Chris right as he woke up that he knew his name was thrown out and that he was Jino's target, and that he had found out from Ashlee, which I already figured bc only three people knew about that plan and I know it wasn't Jino lol. For like a minute i freaked tf out cuz i didn't know how much Ashlee had told Chris. but then I was like NO, y'know what, I am a bad bitch and i will figure out a way to turn this shit right around and still get what tf I wanted in the first place. So at that point I just needed to talk to Evan & tell him "everything" that had happened, I figured coming clean to him was going to help me keep reinforcing my bond with him in the game but that he was also the link to Chris that I needed to get closer to Chris, because when I tried to get close with Chris on my own I always got the feeling he just didn't trust me and didn't really care ab what I was saying. So i talked to Evan, told him everything, then we decided let's tell Chris, get him riled up, but against Ashlee. So we got on a call with the three of us and i told the story again but like I should mention that I very much downplayed Jino and I's involvement in it by a lot alhfkjhdf and pinned everything on Ashlee as the mastermind behind trying to get Chris out, i mean most of it was true, I just like omitted certain details oops. Well, after talking with Chris we got the reaction we wanted and the next stage was talking with Jack because we weren't sure how the votes were going to work bc of the steal-a-vote advantage that Jino was playing on Jack after the tie. So we figured we should include Jack so he's not like wtf and thinks nobody cares about him. and Jack still obviously wanted to go after Jino bc of Jino's locked vote against him but in the end we convinced him Ashlee needed to go in the case that he would be voting after the tie or if the advantage wasn't played on him. So, then tribal happened exactly as expected woohoo. It was a big shame to lose Ashlee because she's a queen and i genuinely respected her a lot and wanted to work with her but I am a very observant kinda person and I just kept seeing things from her that made me feel uneasy about how loyal she really was to *me* and I recognized her threat level so like yeah unfortunately she was the person that I felt needed to go that round. but then in her exit speech she like kept making me out to be this huge target !! Exposing me for being the mastermind behind this blindside and like saying i shouldn't apologize for having a stellar game AKSHDAGBJHSGD i'm like i'm ALREADY a target but thanks i guess lmfao. Anyway so now this brings us to this round, honestly for me, I'd much rather see Alex go. I feel like he has 0 interest in gaming with me and like meh fair enough I did get him out in Crater Lake but this is a new game so like I was always willing to be allies this time but with the way the swaps worked out and stuff like it is just not really happening lmao but never say never. It seems rn the vote might have to be Jack bc even with his light pearl he still has 2 votes against him which is more than other people so like considering we don't really have the numbers unless Chris votes with us (which i'm not confident about) the best bet is Jack to at least tie it, but I also do not want it to tie because if we all vote in a tie, we'd be at a deficit anyway so like whoever they vote for is going anyway. In this worst case scenario I am willing to play my double vote to ensure we don't lose a number on my side but that's like in a have-to situation, ideally i could save it for later on but yeah we'll see. I'm just trying to not freak out that I'm the one going home lmao every round i'm just paranoid that somehow it'll be me but i'm doing what I can so hopefully that's not the case.

"njano"

- this is a jooooooooooke

I figured maybe I was able to plant enough seeds this AM to get Chris/Nora rolling in the direction of Jack but who decides to have the worst campaign to try to save themselves ..? OFC, TRENT. For whatever reason he wanted to go to Nora and like threaten her ab the fact he knows there's votes coming his way and that he won't confirm who leaked until Nora votes along with him. And it's having me be like ???????

Like I literally told Trent last night, make it about you vs. Jack and what you have to offer. Like anything else, any other window dressing he's trying will just bury him. And it sucks now because Trent's campaigning is actually doing worse than Jack doing .. nothing.

The last thing I want to do is be in this swing vote spot but now I very well may be. And now I'm going to have a long internal war of do I want to do the safe long term move and just go along with the stronger side or buckle down, say fuck it and cast a rogue vote and embrace and own why I did it after the blindside.

There's t minus 5 hours but I'm hoping there's a way I get out of this WITHOUT blood on my hands, if I'm getting any that can be later on in the endgame when it's do or die but I CANNOT afford to have it now

"njano"

- It sounds like I might just pull this thing out? Will Nora Evan Chris and I will send Trent packing despite Natalia and Cali allegedly voting me. That light pearl is really gonna save my ass here, defense wins championships baby!! I trust Evan and Chris, and while I’m still sus of Will and Nora I think it makes more sense for them to keep me over Trent.

I thought I was building something with Trent in the OG tribes but when we reconnected at kidnapping it just didn’t feel the same plus he did write my name down and claimed I wasn’t a target?? Just not a believable claim and now Will said his name to me (like Chris predicted) so I gotta go with it to save me

"njano"

- Well Evan told me since yesterday that he wants to do Jack this merge tribal and even today he told me that again. I needed to let him know that i would be on trouble if Trent stays and i promised him to do jack next round to make him happy. Well at least he isbon board now to do jack bc of that. Chris was willing to keep Trent too. Lord. There is just no way for me to let these ppl considering to keep someone that came to me and told me that he sees me will nicole as trio who target him. Like wtf why do u tell me what. U are gonna go after us then. I wanted Trent gone since kikuyu 3.0 and i know i did all i needed ro do tonight to make that happen. I hope he will go home. If not, i will get him out next round. I don't plan on letting personal threat to my game being alive.

"njano"

- Honestly if this vote screws me over I'm going to digest a whole brick.

"njano"

- I honestly could literally be idoled out/blindsided/advantage'd out in the next 20 mins and if that happens well played I guess

as of rn I'm voting Trent, Trent made a messy campaign trail for himself and only further pushed people like Nora against him, and therefore a Nora or a Will have no reason to keep him around, and I cannot risk isolating these people anymore than I have or blowing up things anymore especially after the idol debacle, and ESPECIALLY considering both Will AND Nicole have idols now.

The way it's going I believe is Will/Nora/Jack/Myself/Evan voting Trent and Cali/Natalia voting Jack? If that's not the case well I've been at work for 3 hours I havent been privy to all of the conversations happening so I have no fucking clue I genuinely feel like this could all be a ruse and there's a vote against me in the works, so I just have to hope I've built enough trust with the 7 people voting that my name wouldn't come up, I mean especially considering I have no votes against me going into this tribal from the temptation challenge so they'd really have to want me dead bad if they did that ! We'll see I guess in 20 minutes

"njano"

- So the tea is I am sorry Alex but I discovered the voice was Jack not you. So I am dethroning Alex for my survivor org voice crush and crowning it to Jack. Omg!

"njano"

- Nora really has the audacity to leave me on read for 5 hours and then be like "let's fix this". I'm so petty lmao. anyway, Chris doesn't trust Nora I don't trust Nora and Nora is crazy. I shouldn't get a big say in the vote tonight since I'm automatically voting the clown but I'm hoping Trent goes because he's been trying to pin me/Nora/Will as a trio which as of last night... isn't even real anymore? like literally I hate Nora and will never trust her again... he's also overly paranoid and has a tribal skip so I don't want him using that soon either. It's also apparent that I'm not where his loyalties lie because Chris told me about all of the prey 1.0 information Trent leaked to him.

"njano"

- the other target this tribal is jack there are like many reasons why I want jack to stay. our Sinai trio (pharohoes) is like actually kinda real LMFAO and I don't see any reason why he wouldn't be loyal to us considering we're the ones literally keeping him alive also like he doesn't have good relationships with the preys or the predators.. he could potentially be a wild card later but it's better to keep someone whos by my side at least for the time being and no threat to my wellbeing in this game over like Trent who's going around saying shit. speaking of which if Trent does go out this tribal it means like will's diss rap imm "you've never even made it past the halfway point." it'll be true even with this season, I feel so evil this season idek.

"njano"

- I want to update yall on the alliances or like groups I'm in as of now.

CCBD (Cali, Jino, Natalia & Trent) this alliance isn't very alive right now but I can see it being revived after Trent goes. I know Chris has like kinda an in with Cali/Natalia which is concerning because he's very very powerful right now because he's getting all of the knowledge and they're not talking to me at all. In terms of Jino I think I still may have a hold on him and I'll be able to bring the CCBD back after messy Trent goes.

Save Us (Chris, Nora & Will) This was the original like alliance made on Torrobo 2.0 but there are strains. Chris and Nora are grr at each other (totally not my fault mhmm) and Chris has left the official chat but it's ok because it's likely that we'll still vote together.

Save Us 2.0 (Nora & Will) Kind of a dead chat since save us 1.0 came back but I can still see us working together despite Nora being messy because Will is neutral on the situation and still has Nora pretty much pocketed, might look to expand on this chat later! also for clarification, this chat was made in Kikuyu 3.0 and not just because Chris and Nora hate each other.

Down With Heteronormativity (Alex, Nora & Will) Nora basically forced us to make this chat with Alex to make him feel comfortable come merge during Kikuyu 3.0. She was so forceful about it and tried to make Alex take the centre so blatantly that I think even he could've caught on with it. Alex has no idea about like any of the advantages so zz idk where this is going forward but I don't see it lasting for long.

Pharohoes (Jack & Will) The sinais r here!! I know people are pushing a narrative that the sinais are together but I simply just deny it by saying we literally all voted each other out. I know Alex watched my jury speech praising tf out of will but I don't think he's brought it up with anyone in particular. this is a solid group and I really think me and Will have solid control and influence over a jack so I want this group to be strong going forward for sure.

General Majority (Chris, Evan, Jack, Nora & Will) This isn't an official alliance but it's basically the vibe, it's the group that are sticking together for whatever reasons. Jack is probably desperate and is good with me and Will. Evan is sticking w us as well like basically, this is the general group but I can see this falling apart soon...

In conclusion: get Nora outta all of my alliances x

"njano"

- I'm gonna pretend like no one's saying shit to me this tribal just to relate to jino because he isn't hearing shit either. but I now know that Trent is definitely going home with the whole save us + jack voting him, Cali and Natalia haven't said anything but I assume they're gonna try and vote jack which umm isn't going to go well and will just secure jack's loyalty to me and will. Nora gets more and more annoying by the day, every time I say something she's just like lol Nicole ur lying! then I snapped and was like fine I won't talk to u if u just think that every word I say is a lie and she caved lmao. also ps I did this thing which was very very extra like I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. Chris said that he might not stay awake and get the idol which is like grr because I'M LITERALLY HANDING U AN IDOL JUST TAKE IT?? he decided to sleep instead so I staged the whole vodka thing again with Chris and asked him about alcohol etc made sure Szymon was online so I'd have an actual host online in the timeline to do the puzzle and then "started" the endurance. he managed to sleep long enough for me to mathematically be able to have a lead on him so I got the idol for myself but I had to tell him even though I didn't want to in the beginning but now it's better to since Nora decided to ruin everything. I told Evan and will about it as well. I know that it's bad to tell a lot of people about my idol and it's much better when its hidden (703 Mount Olympus) but this idol used a lot of teamwork and I'd rather not lose people's trust.