Board Thread:Season 14 - Madagascar/@comment-24702957-20140502094447/@comment-24215409-20140503083845

My move at final 7 was planned; I wasn't acting on impulse nor did I change any plans. I had intended on making that move for awhile. I felt that Craig and I joining a group of 3 (you, Jay and Lincoln) or a group of 4 (Taylor, Charley, Trace and Eddie) put us at the bottom of either alliance so I felt that I needed to act accordingly and make room for myself in someone's final 3. So I eliminated strong players like Taylor and Charley in order to be at the top of an alliance with Trace and Eddie.



You had proved your loyalty to Jay countless times up until that point in the game. You even asked that I go to final 5 with you, Craig, Jay and Lincoln and multiple times you said the plan was to vote out Craig at 5 and then Jay and Lincoln would want to vote me out at 4 but you would tie the vote. That plan left me feeling uneasy because you spoke about wanting to go to the end fans strong but you also asked me to vote out Craig so to me, your intensions were unclear and as the game progressed, I found it more and more difficult to understand your motives and to understand your true intentions. And that was good game play on your part but because I was unsure of where your loyalty lied, I felt it was essential to keep people around who I knew I could predict more easily. Going to the end with you and Craig would have been ideal but, as you told me, you had a tight bond with Jay. I wasn't confident that I would be able to make it to the end with you and Craig so I tried to make a preemptive strike in order to ensure that I would be in the final 3. If that meant going to the end with someone who I viewed as a threat, I was prepared to do that and here I am.



Moving on, you're right, final 5 was the point in the game where I felt the most vulnerable. In the auction I had won the light pearl, an item that would have automatically negated a vote for me. While the light pearl may not have been enough to save me, it would have forced a tie. On the revote, the opportunity to vote me out would have been there but I would have tried, and hopefully succeeded, to persuade someone to vote with me and not against me, whether it had ben before the initial vote or at the revote. I never lost hope and I knew that I had some strong arguments I could make for myself and some angles I could try and work in order to make the vote work out in my favor.



As for my social game, I know that I apologized for my actions a lot, maybe more than I should have, but if you knew me in real life you'd know that I apologize for EVERYTHING. If I accidentally walk into an inanimate object, I apologize. It's in my nature, after all I'm Canadian. (It's a stereotype that Canadians are overly polite and say sorry for everything)



I knew that being a girl in a predominantly male game would put me at a disadvantage. I'm a big fan of the show, and I know that women are held to a different standard over men in the game. I realized that Jay was being perceived as being very cocky by most of our tribe. I don't think that being nice to people put me on the radar and made people want to vote me out, on the other hand, Jay being arrogant is what made people want him out. And that's where I feel that social game is important in Survivor. It's about how you treat others and like I do in real life, I tried to treat everyone with respect in this game. If that meant apologizing for something that I did, then I did it because as people and as players I respect each and every one of you. When I apologized, I apologized on a personal level but on a game level, I can't apologize for the moves that I made because I knew what I did was right for my game. My apologies were only meant to comfort anyone who felt betrayed on a personal level, that's all.